The last piece falls into place, completing the puzzle I’ve been trying to solve for months.
My father killed my birth mother.
The statement runs through my mind, but they are just words, a string of letters that make little sense right now. It can’t be true.
My father killed my birth mother.
I test out the words again, but I still can’t grasp their meaning. My lungs burn, and I realize I’ve been holding my breath. Sucking in a deep breath, the room suddenly spins, and bile rises in my throat.
My father killed my birth mother.
Slowly, like a dripping faucet filling up a sink, the gravity of what I just found out sets in. Because of him, I’ll never know my birth mother. Not only did he take her from me, but he also tried to cover it up and erase her, like she never existed at all.
Images of my father ripping me from a faceless woman’s arms fill my head. Did she cry, beg, and fight for me? Was I there while he did it, crying for her? Did he make me watch?
Fucking Christ.I shut the laptop so forcefully I’m sure I crack the screen. A million questions, but not a single answer. I run my fingers through my hair, pulling at the longer strands as hard as I can without pulling it from my scalp. The pain doesn’t even register. I’m numb. Overwhelmed. So many emotions run rampant that I can’t feel a single one.
How could he do this to me?
I don’t understand how anyone could do this to their child, but I know that I have to ask him face to face. I need answers.
On autopilot, I get up from my desk and walk across my room. I grab my bag from the bottom of my closet and start stuffing essentials in it. I grab my jacket and slip into my boots on the way out of my room. With my bag slung over my shoulder, I head straight for the door, walking past Ren without even noticing him.
“Where the hell are you going?”
I stop and turn toward him just as he is getting up from the couch.
“I have to go back home,” I explain. “I can’t stay.”
“What? Why?” Ren asks, perplexed. “What’s wrong? Just let me grab my shit, and we’re out of here.”
“No! You need to stay.”
“What the fuck?” Ren is getting more agitated by the second, heading toward me like a bull seeing red. “Tell me what the fuck is going on right now!”
“My father killed my birth mother,” I blurt out, making him come to a sudden halt.
His anger turns into shock immediately. The astounded look in his eyes tells me he didn’t know, which I just now realize is something else I have to worry about. Who all knows about this? Who knows what my father did but has been keeping his dark secret from me? Does Mom know? Uncle Damon?
“Are you sure?” Ren asks carefully.
“Yes,” I say confidently.
There is no fucking way Aspen is that great of an actress, not to mention it all makes sense. Why else would he keep it from me? Why else would he erase everything about her?
Of course, he killed her. It’s what my father does. If people don’t obey him, they pay.
“Why don’t you want me to come with you?”
“I want you to stay here and watch out for Aspen. You need to protect her from Matteo. He is going to try to get to her without me being here.”
For a moment, I think he is going to refuse. A weight is lifted off my chest when he sighs. “All right, I’ll make sure she is safe.”
“Thank you. I owe you.”
“I’ll hold you to it.”
“I know you will.” I turn around and leave our apartment. Whatever Ren is going to call in, this favor is going to be worth it. I have to see my father, but I can’t leave Aspen unprotected, because no matter what she thinks, she can’t keep herself safe.
That’s my job now.