“Let me show you the inside,” I tell her nervously. Shit, I didn’t think I would be this tense, but my mind is reeling. What if she says no? What if she doesn’t want this?
Shaking those thoughts away, I get out of the truck. The car ride has put Gwen to sleep, so I unhook the car seat from its base and carry her like that.
I walk up to the front of the house and reach into my pocket to dig out the key I picked up this morning. Penny follows every step I take while looking around with wonder.
I unlock the door and push it open, ushering her inside. Mojo pushes past us and starts running through the house, sniffing every corner like he is making sure there is no danger inside.
The house is already furnished, ready to move in.
“I bought it from a family who moved overseas, so they sold it with all their shit inside. Their kids were older, though, so I had to redo the baby’s room. Do you want to see it?”
Penny’s mouth is hanging open when she nods her head. I think she is too shocked to get a single word out.
I lead her up the stairs and to the room, I hope our daughter will stay in. The walls were already pink, but I had to buy new furniture for the nursery. The white crib is pushed up against the wall, a star mobile hanging above it. A matching changing table and dresser are on the other side. But the best part of this room is the bay window surrounded by a bookshelf.
“Do you like it?” I ask hesitantly.
“It’s beautiful. I mean, who wouldn’t love it?” She looks around the room and runs her hand along the rails of the crib. “Ryder, what is all of this? Why did you buy this house?”
“I want you and Gwen to live here…with me. I bought this house for you, I mean, for us. I know I fucked up in the past. I know you don’t have a reason to trust me, but I want to make this right. I want you and Gwen in my life for good.”
“Wow.” She sighs deeply. “That’s a lot to take in.”
“I know. You don’t have to decide right now, and if you don’t want to live here with me, the house is still yours.”
“I don’t know what to say,” she admits.
When she turns back around to face me, I notice how pale she looks.
“Are you okay? You look like you’re about to pass out.”
“I might.” She smiles. “I’ve barely slept the last week.” She rubs her eyes with the back of her hand.
“Come on then, you can lie down in here for a bit.” I walk her to the room next to the nursery. The master suite was one of the selling points of this house.
Penny groans when she sees the king-sized bed in the room. “I might sleep for a few days if I dare to lie down in that.”
“Better than passing out in the nursery. Come on, get in,” I order. “I’m not taking no for an answer.”
“Demanding as always.” Penny rolls her eyes at me but slips out of her shoes and crawls into the bed.
Mojo trots into the room, sniffing around the car seat like he is making sure the baby is safe. When he seems satisfied, he finds a spot under the window to flop down.
I unbuckle Gwen and carefully get her out of the car seat, so I can put her in the center of the bed. Penny curls up next to her and closes her eyes. She goes to sleep almost immediately.
I take off my boots and climb into the bed slowly, so I don’t wake either of them. I lie down but keep my head turned, so I can watch both of them.
For the first time since I left Penny, I feel at peace. I feel like I could have a happy life with them. We could be a family.
I just have to prove to Penny that I can do this. That I can love them the way they deserve, and that I deserve their love in return.