“It doesn’t matter. She’s a problem I’ve brought to you. She’s something that will follow me no matter where I go or what I do. She’s always going to be a bone ofcontention.”
“I don’t think that,” I said. “I don’t think the others doeither.”
“They just don’t want to sayit.”
I released his hand, reaching up to cup his face. I held him between my palms and forced his ice blue eyes to meet my gaze. “Stop it,” I hissed. “Stop blaming yourself for what she puts you through. For whatsheputs us through. Her actions and choices are not yours. You can’t hold yourselfresponsible.”
“She’s doing thisbecauseof me,” hesaid.
“That doesn’t make it yourfault.”
He shook me off, turning and striding a few feet away as his shoulders heaved. He was a man on the edge, strung tight. I could see the desire to hit something sliding through his skin like a disease that wouldn’t becured.
“It’s simple cause and effect,” he said. “I left and now she’sretaliating.”
“So?” I ran a hand through my hair, dislodging some of the strands as they scattered around my face and mask. I reached up and yanked the thing from my face and let it fall to thefloor.
Grayson whirled around to face me, reaching up and yanking his mask off when he saw mine gone. “I’m the cause, Harlow. It ismyfault.”
I rolled my eyes. “Oh, stop it. Stop being a martyr, damn it. She’s not as all important as she thinks sheis.”
He gestured wildly, striding back and forth in a line. “So, what then? You’re okay with her just following us around for the rest of our lives? You’re okay with her always being there to throw a wrench in our plans?” He stopped and looked at me, his crystal clear gaze cold and serious. “And what if we want to get married? Whatthen?”
“After you turn twenty-one, things will…” I started, but he shook hishead.
“I don’t trust it,” he said. “She may be doing this—coming at us this hard because of the time constraint, but if you think she’ll just give up the second my birthday hits, then you haven’t been paying attention. She’s not going toquit.”
“Then we just have to make her,” I snapped. “Or are you giving up? Are you done? I thought you wanted to be a part of Iris. I thought you wanted to be friends with Marv—and the others…” I trailed off, not wanting to say the next bit but knowing the question needed to be asked. “Are you giving up onme?”
“Iris…” he started. “It’s not aboutIris.”
“Answer the question,Grayson.”
He paused for a moment and my chest squeezed tight. His eyes glossed over, but still, he didn’t reply. I waited, but no words escaped his lips. I took a step back, my mouth tightening, my eyes burning. I didn’t want to cry, but I felt the tears slowly building, rising from the depths of mypain.
“You promised you wouldn’t regret this,” Isaid.
Still, he didn’t respond, and it felt like my chest was being cracked open. A lack of an answer was ananswer.
I turned around before I could do something stupid and walkedaway.
Lots of people say that the whole heart is a beautiful thing. I disagree. I think a heart in pieces is the most beautiful because each piece can be given to someone. A heart in pieces can love multiple times over, but a whole heart could only loveonce.
As we road silently in the limo back to the house, Grayson avoided not just my gaze, but the guys’ as well. I felt as though one of those pieces of my heart had been shattered. Unfortunately, for me, I felt like those new, smaller, pieces were already in love with someone and couldn’t love anyoneelse.
I lovedKnix.
I lovedMarv.
I lovedBellamy.
I lovedTexas.
And…my broken pieces loved Grayson too. I only wished that wasenough.