When I finally managed to open my eyes and look up, I wasn’t shocked at all—though I felt like I should have been—by who it was. His eyes bore into mine, searching and insecure. But I knew he understood. The vulnerability that I had crashed into, that had washed over me even if for only a brief, soul-crushing moment, was reflected in those ice-blue eyes of his. And despite the uneven rise and fall of my shuddering breaths, when I leaned up and slanted my mouth over his—desperate for what, I wasn’t sure—he didn’t refuse me. No. Grayson welcomedit.
I fell into the kiss like drops of water from the clouds. Naturally. But I wasn’t ever quite sure where I was going to land. Grayson just let me go. He let me leap and no matter where I was going—in this moment, I was sure he’d catch me. His hands traced up and down my spine—stoking a hunger in me. I reached up and clutched his collar, pulling myself towardshim.
I kept my lips pressed to his. He was my oxygen, my breath. My legs shifted over to either side of his hips and my core aligned with the seam of his jeans. Surprisingly, when I pulled back and gripped his hair—panting with the need for more, more safety, more feeling… justmore—he let me lick at his lips. Grayson opened his mouth for me, groaned as I lowered my core over his growing erection. The sparks that danced through my bones chased away any lingering illeffects.
His large hands gripped my hips as he ground himself into me, shifting his hips until my breath caught once more. I pressed forward, dipping my tongue against his. This was different. Our first kiss had been hurried and rushed. Ripe with danger and knowing that we could have been caught at any minute. This was light and easy. Just as hot, yes, but incrediblyfreeing.
Could a person feel like they were flying and grounded all in onebreath?
The answer:yes.
Grayson took over, crushing his lips against mine. Tongue sinking into my mouth and twining with mine. He cupped the back of my head with one hand and gripped my hips, keeping my lower body pinned to his with the other. I felt him pulse through our clothes and a shudder rippled up my legs. Tingles like little sharp points scraped against my flesh as Grayson devouredme.
Then that hand of his slipped around to my front. My eyes popped open. So did his. He waited, his fingers tracing the edge of my yoga pants as he waited for my permission. Something was happening. Right here. Right now. I could make a decision. What did I want to do? Did I want to ignore what I had heard him say? Or did I want to answerhim?
He lovedme.
Grayson Caruso loved me. Harlow Hampton. Normal girl extraordinaire. Well, I suppose I wasn’t normalanymore.
What did I want to do with that confession even if he hadn’t meant for me to hear? I know one thing I didn’t want to do and that was cut his golden thread. So, I took a breath and I nodded. Grayson kissed me again and slipped the tips of his fingers under the fabric. If he was surprised by my lack of underwear, he didn’t say or do anything to let me know. His fingers simply lowered down to my core and pressed against me, turning until they thrummed against a shocking bundle of nerves. I jumped in his arms, tearing my lipsaway.
“Are you okay?” hepanted.
I clenched my hips on either side of him as his fingers stilled. “I don’t want you to stop,” I finally said, meeting his gaze. Our foreheads pressed together, and our breaths mixed as his entire hand disappeared into my pants and then a finger slid up inside me. I jerked again at the electricity of thefeeling.
“Shhh.” His mouth lowered to the bared skin of my neck. He began to lick away the dried tears there and then he began to move. Grayson’s fingers pumped in and out, back and forth. I blinked, feeling a blinding, building tension climbing the walls of my insides. Something just out of reach but growing closer. Not unlike when Bellamy had put his mouth down there. I found myself rising up on my knees and then grinding down on hisfingers.
The one inside me moved with purpose, with enough energy to leave me gasping and seeking that just out of reach spark. Grayson’s free hand moved to my chest sliding across the fabric that separated us. Even through the sports bra and tank top, I could see the outline of my nipple when I looked down. He pinched it and a noise that sounded halfway between a shriek and a moan was pulled from my lips. Even with the layers between his fingers and my nipple, I had felt the tug of that pinch down to where his other fingers continued to manipulate the nerves between my legs. I widened my knees, needing more, needing itharder.
Grayson grinned up at me, a smirk that reminded me of who he was when I had first met him—well, technically, when I had first actually paid attention to him. All smartass. It was hot and sexy as hell, that grin. Especially right now. With his hand in my pants, stroking me closer and closer to what promised to be a show of fireworks. It was like the walls were caving in and I was drowning under the crushing weight, but Grayson was there. He held them up. Put himself between me and the walls—and then he looked at me…when he looked at me something eased in my chest. It made me feel softer, warmer, lessbroken.
“Harlow,” he grunted, dropping the grin as another finger slid up inside me alongside the first. He scissored them apart and I gasped at the feeling of being stretched. “Babydoll.”
I squeezed my eyes closed, praying that he wouldn’t stop. And thankfully, he didn’t. His breathing increased and so did the speed of his fingers. They moved in and out and when his thumb moved back up to the little button above where his fingers were—I couldn’t stop myself. I gasped and ground myself down on his erection as hard as I could, rocking back and forth with the sensation of the overwhelming fire that raced across my skin. Grayson groaned and then rested his forehead on my shoulder as the hand he held at my chest shot down to his crotch and dove into thewaistband.
Only when the fire fizzled out, did I realize we were both panting hard. Slowly, I opened my eyes and found his chest rising and falling to the pace of my own and his gaze on mine. “Wow.”
He smirked before kissing me quickly on the lips. “Wow is right, Babydoll. But with you, I kinda expect a lot of ‘wows’.”
I didn’t know what to say to that. So, when he pulled his hand from my pants and slid me off his lap, I didn’t protest. No matter how good resting against him had felt. “Um…” I trailed off, cheeks flushing. “I can…um…take care of you,” I offered lamely, “if youwant.”
Grayson stood up and then slid his other hand out of his pants, revealing those fingers to be as sticky as the hand that had been in my pants. My cheeks didn’t just flush—they flamed a bright red. “Don’t worry about it,” he said, bumping the knobs on the sink with his elbow before pumping the soap dispenser the same way and letting a large amount of foam soap pile into his free hand. “I’m pretty sure it’s taken careof.”
Grayson finished washing his hands and then helped me stand. “You okay?” heasked.
I nodded as my eyes slid to the floor and stayed there until Grayson tucked a finger under my chin and raised me up. His lips were turned down. “I mean it, Harlow. Are youokay?”
I bit my bottom lip and though my head was tilted back so that his eyes could examine me, I kept my own gaze trained away—an embarrassed flush tinting my cheeks a dark pink. I knew because I could see the rising color in my reflection. "I'm fine," I assuredhim.
In my peripheral vision, I watched as his frown deepened. "Then why won't you look at me? Do you regretit?"
Finally, my eyes flashed to his. I blinked at the raging uncertainty I found in the depths of his gaze. It was so strong that it made my breath catch in my throat. "I don't regret it." That's the truth. That's what makes my chest clench—the fact that I don't regret it. And maybe he saved me from my own crazy insecurities and fears, but that doesn't erase that there's still so much that we—him, me, and the guys—still need to talk about. I want to know—I have to know—if I've lost them. Grayson doesn't speak for them and maybe he can handle the fact that he now knows that I don't want to, that Ican't, choose, but that doesn't mean any of the otherscan.
At my words, though, the tension in Grayson's shoulders and face eases. It doesn't disappear completely, but the lines around his mouth smooth out and his muscles unclench slightly. He drops my chin and reaches for my hand. "Good," he replied, squeezing my coldfingers.
He reached past me and pushed the door open. I let him tug me behind him, filing into the hospital room to find several angry and confused stares. My tongue slapped the top of my mouth and dried up. The chills of anxiety wrapped long, tentacled fingers around my neck. Marv's tornado eyes trailed down to where my fingers were clutched in Grayson's hand, accusation evident. Knix and Bellamy remained quiet, but I could see the vulnerability in their gazes—the question and the confusion. Surprisingly, Texas was the one that approached us first. When I thought he, too, would hold back, he moved right up to us and took my otherhand.
"How are you feeling?" heasked.