Then, like he remembers who I’m supposed to be to him, he pulls back, acting like he's been burned, getting too close to the fire. Abruptly he crosses the room, running his hand through his hair like he does when he's lost in thought.
"I can't do this," he says, and then walks out of the room.
Garrett
I don't even make it but one step into the living room. I should have known she wouldn't drop this. It isn't in her to let things go so easily.
"Why not?" She asks from behind me.
I can feel her right behind me. So close that, if I turned around, she’d be right there. So close, that I could kiss her, run my hands through her hair, and have my way with her. All the things I want to do, but I can't.
Forming two fists, I try to release the tension shooting through my body, before taking a few steps into the living room and turning to her. She’s still standing in the doorway watching me.
"Because I’m horrible at relationships, and I can't lose you," I say with as much honesty as I can give her.
Not only has she been my best friend, since we were kids, but she was my first everything. I don't think I could handle losing her. I'd be so lost without her.
She crosses her arms, pushing her bountiful breasts up, and I curse myself for noticing. Then, she studies me carefully for a moment, like she can tell I'm not giving her the whole truth.
"Who says you are horrible at relationships?" She asks, raising an eyebrow at me.
I give a bitter laugh. It would be a shorter list to give her the people who haven't said it. Trying to find a way out of this conversation, I shake my head.
"I remember this between us being pretty damn good. So again, who says you are horrible at them?"
She’s right. Things between us were good. But we were kids, barely eighteen, and now, so much has changed. We had a lot to learn back then and a lot of growing up to do.
"Every girl who has tried to tie me down," I admit.
She takes a step towards me, but I hold my ground. I should move away, but Kaylee has this draw to her that makes you want to be close to her, even when she's mad at you.
"Maybe, it's because they knew you had feelings for someone else."
Whoa! I jerk back. What the hell is she saying? How is she hitting so close to home? There’s a reason I’m labeled a playboy. I knew what I wanted, and what I wanted was Kaylee, but there wasn’t another version of her out there, so I didn’t want to waste anyone’s time.
Then, the small-town gossip mill started its work, seeing me with a different girl all the time. So, they gave me the playboy label, and I ran with it, happy to use it to keep a wall up.
I just shake my head. I'm not going to open that can of worms, especially not tonight.
"No, we can't."
How much did she have to drink tonight? Two glasses over dinner with me? Did she have any, while I was in the shower? She had to have had one or two because she isn't thinking straight.
"When you’re sober tomorrow, you’ll see that, too," I tell her.
She just stares me down, and I stare right back, not willing to budge on this. Not even an inch.
"Fine, but I'm staying here tonight."
Turning, she stomps off to her bedroom. My parents thought of her as their daughter, and once her mother died, she spent a lot of time here, while her dad worked and grieved. Even though she had been perfectly capable of taking care of herself, he didn't want her to be alone.
Only when I hear the slam of her bedroom door, do I collapse onto the couch.
What the fuck just happened?
Throwing my head back, I stare up at the ceiling. When she came over, I swear I thought she'd yell at me for ruining her date. Then, we’d talk about how she deserves to be treated like a queen, how a city boy won't understand her, and we'd be okay. She'd go home, and I'd give her a week to cool off. After that, we'd hang out next weekend, as if it never happened.
Instead, I'm sitting here at what feels like a crossroads at a bridge. I'm not ready to cross, but if I don’t go across and just do nothing, I’ll lose her forever. Instead, I feel like I'm being shoved over the bridge, and I don't like this feeling at all.