“Sorry,” I muttered to the girls as I took a seat and faced them. “I didn’t mean to go crazy, it’s just, you know…”
“We know…” they both chimed.
“But Fred, you need to attempt a way forward,” Chrissie admitted.
“She’s right,” Isobel chimed in.
“I know. It’s just hard,” I whispered.
I heard the sound of the familiar bell that was ingrained into my mind as I turned around and the wheels of my swivel chair glided across the freshly cleaned lacquered floor to face the next customer of this long drawn out shift. I shuffled the pile of scanned photocopies into a neatened pile and attached a paperclip to the top and greeted the guest.
“Welcome to The Wilden. How can I be of service?”
CHAPTERTHREE
LUKE
Ihave been in New York for a couple of weeks now. I love it here. For the first time in what felt like a long time, I was excited to wake up in the mornings. I looked forward to see what the day would bring.
I never classed myself as a depressed person, but since Tye had died, I doubt myself, asking the worst existential questions that there were.
What was I doing with my life? Where did I want to be? What would my life look like in five years?
And then the worst question of all, which I would never tell another soul about.
Who would miss me if I was no longer here?
It’s a question that I’m sure we all ask ourselves from time to time, but what I didn’t like about the question was the feeling of emptiness I had at the thought that the only people thatwouldmiss me would be my friends. I didn’t have that soulmate. That one person whose world would end when I was no longer breathing.
It sounded silly, but I wanted that. I wanted to have someone that I was connected to on another level. I wanted to be so close to someone that it made me question everything. I wanted that love you only see in movies. That love where the whole world revolves around that other person. I wanted to not know where I ended and they began.
I wanted to matter to someone.
Being in the city, I was determined to enjoy this time away from London. I had spoken to Thomas, and we had agreed it might be good for me to have some time away. He told me to take a load off, get a job while I was out here, and learn what I could about the American hospitality sector.
So that’s what I was doing. I had gotten a job at a hotel called The Wilden. It was a very fancy place, so rocking up to work in one of my many rocker tees and jeans with worn holes in the knees wouldn’t do. Instead, I had to dress like a gentleman.
Black suit trousers, white shirt and a pair of black braces that crossed in an X on my back. I felt like I belonged in a 1920s black and white film or in a bar scene from a 1940s war film. Luckily for me, I was so good-looking I could make anything look good. The ladies seemed to like how I looked in my uniform.
Who knows? Maybe I’d meet someone worth getting to know, but for now, I’d just focus on the job, seeing the sights of the city and anything else that may want to come my way.
Grabbing my coat, I left the apartment and began making my way to The Wilden Bar. Fingers crossed, it’d be a nice and easy shift. That was the good thing about working in a hotel. It kept me busy. There was always a varied selection of clients to keep things interesting and if I was lucky, that sexy man in the suit might come in.
* * *
It was getting toward one am and I only had an hour left to go. It was still a little busy, but this would be the time where people would start to slowly leave, finishing their last drink of the night before collapsing into their beds or upstairs, I guess. Or wherever it is they’d be calling home tonight. I know some of the workers in the hotel frequented the bar occasionally after their shifts.
Speaking of shifts, my man in the suit had yet to show his face. He usually picked the same table each night, but that was sitting empty. I didn’t like that I was monitoring his comings and goings, but there was just something about him that called to me. Considering he and I hadn’t even spoken two fucking words to each other, it was ridiculous that I spent my whole shift just waiting for him to appear.
“What’s got you looking so miserable, handsome?” Sally asks as she stops in front of me with an empty tray. “Another round for the table at the back.”
I pop open a bottle of red and begin filling the glasses. “Nothing.”
“Well, smile once in a while!” She grinned at me. “Personally, I don’t see what’s worth obsessing over.”
“Obsessing?” I asked her. What the hell was she on about now? This woman jumped so quickly from one topic to another I could never keep up.
“Yeah.” She leaned her elbows on the bar as I placed the three wine glasses down on her empty tray. “The guy in the corner has been looking at you all night. At least smile and give him something pretty to look at.” She gave me a wink before she sauntered off to deliver the drinks.