She nods and continues to watch me carefully as I squeeze honey into our mugs before dipping the tea bags in hot water.
Tonight is going to be an emotional evening for her too, maybe even more than me. She spent some of her early childhood in that house with Sophia and Ash.
“How do you feel? Do you remember anything yet?” I ask, passing her the mug.
“Not much. I’ve been trying to remember for some time now. I think of a purple room and…some elephant posters on a wall. I don’t know.” Her eyebrows furrow, and I can see how much this is affecting her. “It could just have been a dream or some TV show,” she says with a grim expression I don’t like at all.
Over the weeks, I’ve transformed into some sort of pregnancy podcast junkie, making notes on what to do and what not to do when someone you know is pregnant. Making her unhappy is a topper on the list of not-to-do things.
“I got you something.” I open the top drawer of my desk and pull out a plastic box.
She immediately recognizes it, and her eyes twinkle as the corners of her mouth quirk up in a huge smile.
Another effect of pregnancy? Mood swings.
“Zander baked for us?” she asks, already opening the lid of the box.
Zander didn’t just bake, but he baked her favorite.
“Lemon bars!” Kristy squeals. “Rosie, you hit the jackpot with that man.”
I sure did.
“Remember, if you feel uncomfortable, just say the word and we’ll leave. No one is gonna think anything,” Zander tells me for the umpteenth time this evening.
We walk hand in hand to the porch, and Zander rings the bell. My heart pounds against my chest as I stand in front of the door for the second time. But today it looks different.
“Did something change?”
“Yes. Beast renovated the house. The exterior was gray before.”
Now it’s painted ivory; that’s why it feels warm.
Ash opens the door. He hugs and pats Zander on the back before engulfing me in one of his bear hugs.
I’m at once startled, and my body stiffens involuntarily. He quickly realizes his mistake, but before he can draw back, I return his hug.
When we pull apart, he has a wide smile on his face.
“Come in.” He ushers us from the living room to the backyard.
Wow!
My heart skips a beat, and my steps halt at the sight of everyone seated under the huge magnolia tree, lanterns hanging from its branches. There’s a fire pit roaring on the side. If not for the tense and hesitant faces, this scene would look as if it were plucked out of a family magazine.
After Zander and I have taken the two empty seats around the circular table, Kristy, who’s sitting beside me, gives my hand a light squeeze.
An awkward silence stretches for several moments, until Ash clears his throat. “We made some changes to the house. You girls can look around, um—only if you like.”
When Kristy nods and I mimic her response, Ash’s face lights up, and he gives us that wide, happy smile again. “Soph and I really hope you girls like it.” His gaze shifts from us to Sophia, who’s sitting next to him.
Tonight, she’s wearing a red dress. I don’t remember ever seeing her in any other color than white, gray, or black. But next to Beast, in this gorgeous house and beautiful backyard, with burning candles and daisies on the table along with polished cutlery, she fits in well.
She belongs here.
Upon seeing her happily getting back on with her life, an ache develops in some corner of my heart.
Will it ever get better?