“Of course. And thank you for trusting me enough to share something so personal.”
She nodded tightly.
When night fell and they went inside, Brax tried to convince her to take the bed, but she was having none of it.
“You slept on the floor last night. I’ll take the sofa.”
“Raven—”
“No. You carried water, chopped wood, drove to the market, and haven’t slept in a bed since we left New Orleans. We had an agreement, remember?”
“We did, but—”
She shook her head. “Take the bed. It’s your turn.”
“That sofa is past awful to sleep on. I’ll feel bad knowing you’re out here wrestling with it.”
“I’m sure I’ve slept on worse.”
“Then how about we share the bed so we both get some sleep. You’re doing wash tomorrow. You shouldn’t be exhausted before you even begin, and you will be if you attempt to sleep on that poor excuse for a sofa.”
“No. We both know what will happen if we share the bed. Neither of us will get any sleep.”
“What if I promise to be on my best behavior?”
“I’ve seen your best behavior. It’s how I ended up walking like a drunken sailor the night on the verandah.”
“But you enjoyed yourself.”
“That’s not the issue here, and stop trying to change the subject.”
He folded his arms over his chest. “Is that what I’m doing?”
“Yes. And stop smiling.”
“Will I earn a reward if I comply?”
She laughed softly, and he enjoyed knowing she hadn’t been able to suppress it.
She said, “I’m going to get my night things out of the room. I’ll see you in the morning.”
He didn’t press any further. “Okay, but if you decide the sofa is a poor choice, just come join me.”
As they took in each other in the quiet, he again wondered how he’d be able to return to Boston without her.
She retrieved her items from the room and as she exited, he said softly, “Good night, Raven.”
“Sleep well,” she replied.
Later, lying in the dark, Raven realized he’d told the truth about the awfulness of the sofa. The cushions beneath her had to be filled with rocks, and the stench of mildew they exuded curled her nose. Both factors made finding sleep a challenge, but her biggest challenge was her pretend husband in the bedroom. How much longer would she be able to keep him at a distance when her body wanted nothing but him? She thought back on their conversation out on the porch. It hadn’t been her intent to confess what she had. Her difficulty with reading wasn’t something she willingly shared. Yet she had, with him, and still didn’t know why. Yes, she’d warned him not to laugh or poke fun at what she intended to reveal,but a part of herself seemed to know threatening him hadn’t been necessary. His soft plea to let him help her made her turn away so he wouldn’t see the tears stinging her eyes, and just the memory of the tenderness in his voice made them sting again. “Lord!” she whispered, wiping the tears away. Why did he affect her so deeply? In the short time since being introduced, he’d gone from being a man she’d intensely disliked to one she’d entrusted with her innermost secret. Nothing about this made sense, and she didn’t even want to think about how she’d relished being half naked on his lap in the moonlight while his kisses and touches reduced her to a legs-spread, orgasming mess. How had this happened? Their differences in upbringing, social status, and views of the world were many, and yet there was a shining kindness hidden beneath his staid, stodgy exterior that overrode them. He’d pumped water for her that morning, chopped the wood she’d needed to light the stove, and gifted her with a bar of rose-scented soap. This evening, he’d offered to help her become better at reading, and tried to convince her to trade places with him so she could sleep in the bed. She’d always pumped her own water and chopped her own wood. There’d never been anyone to take on those chores for her, and she didn’t know how to handle someone who believed he should because, outside of family, life had dealt herso little kindness. If she weren’t careful, he’d have her eating out of his hand like the women of Boston tripping over themselves to catch his eye. Her attraction to him was undeniable though. Undeniable and unfortunate, because there was no future in it. But did she need a future to enjoy his touches, kisses, and kindness? Truthfully, the answer was no, as long as she kept her heart locked away. Based on what she’d experienced so far, falling in love with him would have her comparing men against him for the rest of her life and she wasn’t sure any would measure up.