Chapter Fourteen
August 30, 1817
Elizabeth paced the confines of the small parlor as she wrung her hands. Her nerves felt strung too tight, but alternately, tingles of anticipation zipped up and down her spine. Never in her life had she been so anxious or excited. In moments, Brand would arrive. He’d promised to escort her to Lord Nelson’s home in style but hadn’t had more details than that.
“I should forbid you from going tonight,” William grumbled from his place in the chair.
The sound of his voice snapped her from her musings. She came to a halt by the window which looked out onto the street. “You can, of course, but I won’t obey.”
“No, I didn’t think you would. Ever since you’ve met that man, you’ve changed.”
“For the better, I hope.” A small grin curved her mouth, and she couldn’t stop it. Spending time with the captain had given her confidence she hadn’t known she possessed. She’d also developed a backbone while her mind had expanded past the narrow views she’d had before the advent of Brand.
“That remains to be seen. It doesn’t matter. All too soon we’ll be gone from here and you can forget the captain.” William huffed. “However, I’m going to let you go, for this unprecedented access to the wealthy of Ipswich is exactly what we need to spread the Gospel or perhaps even garner donations to help fund our upcoming trip.”
Ah, and there was the truth of the matter. He wanted the coin. Elizabeth bit her bottom lip to keep from blurting out a response she might regret later. So, she declined to answer. “You could try being happy for me.”
“What is there to rejoice about? He’ll no doubt ruin you… if he hasn’t already.” The pause was obviously her chance to deny the charge, but she declined on that too. He sighed. “Why can’t you see the man is a bounder?”
“Why can’t you see he’s as human as the rest of us and trying? Deep down inside, he’s a good person.” She didn’t need to hear Brand’s confession to know that. It was reflected in everything he did or said.
William snorted. “When you fall—and you will—I hope you’ll remember to repent clearly and openly, for he’ll drag you down in the muck with him.”
“And you’ll be there to forever remind me you’ve forgiven me.” That was what William did. He couldn’t just talk about a misdeed once. Oh no, he had to trot out her shortcomings every chance he got, with the reminder that he’d forgiven her. No one deserved that in their lives.
“That is my right.”
“Your right can go hang,” she said, and then was immediately contrite. “Please trust me enough to know I can make my own decisions. For better or for worse, they’re mine alone, and I’ve had precious little of that in my life.”
“I’m more concerned with your eternal soul than your decisions.”
“Of course you are.” Elizabeth shook her head. “But where’s the fun in that?”
“You shouldn’t be seeking entertainment or fleeting pleasures, Sister. Your purpose in this life is to live for the Creator and draw others into the fold.”
“Where they’ll learn that everything is a drudgery and they’ll never be allowed to do anything that brings a smile again?” Where had that thought come from? More to the point, why had she spoken it aloud?
“It seems like the devil has been your constant companion, Elizabeth.”
“I’m not that naïve or careless.”
Her palms inside the elbow-length gloves were sweaty. She ran her hands down the front of her gown and once more sent up a prayer of thanks for Brand’s largesse. It was the most wonderful piece of clothing she’d ever owned let alone donned. The ballgown of turquoise satin was the exact color she imagined the sea must be. White ribbons trimmed the low bodice and the short, gathered sleeves. Tiny clear beads and white seed pearls were scattered over the skirt and twinkled with each movement. Fine silk stockings and lawn underthings made her feel like royalty while matching satin slippers completed the ensemble.
Then her breathing hitched. An open carriage pulled by a dappled gray horse came to a halt at the curb in front of the townhouse. Brand manipulated the reins, and oh he was magnificent in dark evening clothes! A top hat sat at a rakish angle on his head; his wild hair had been tamed and combed, but he was still every inch the devilish ship captain, and her heart raced at the handsome picture he made with the beginnings to twilight as a backdrop.
“Captain Storme is here.” Exhilaration bled into her voice. She spun away from the window and then had to remind herself not to pelt through the room. On her way past William’s chair, she dropped a kiss upon his cheek. “I’ll probably be late in coming home, so please don’t feel the need to wait on me.”
“Elizabeth, stop.” He grabbed her wrist, holding her with a vice-like grip. His eyes were hard and cold as he met her gaze. “Deporting yourself like the world and dressed as a lightskirt is a certain way to usher in sin. Do not relax your guard tonight. You are not the same as the people you’ll mingle with, and that world is not your future.”
Some of joy bubbling through her chest died. She yanked her hand from his hold. “How could I forget exactly what my future is? You’ve told me enough times I don’t have one.”
“We live for the world beyond this one, sister.”
“I know.” Blinking away quick tears, she made her way to the door. “Let me have this one night to experience things that make a woman feel wanted and needed. It’s not that much to ask before I put all of this away and leave for India with you.”
Not waiting for his reply, she exited the room. A pat of her hair confirmed that her homemade attempt at sweeping up her tresses still held. No doubt it would pale in comparison to the ladies she’d see tonight, but there was nothing for it. By the time she opened the front door, Brand had come up the short walkway.
His eye widened with surprise and pleasure as he raked his gaze up and down her person. “Of all things holy on land or sea,” he whispered, admiration evident in the tone. “You’re beautiful, Elizabeth, and you look like the sea personified.”