Silence rolled between them except for when they both placed an order.
“I’m glad you’re encouraged by that bit of feeling returning to your leg,” she began in a bid for conversation.”
“It probably won’t last.” He kept his gloved hands palm flat on the table across from her.
If she reached out, she could easily touch them. But she didn’t dare. “Will you keep me appraised of any new development?”
He grunted. “I don’t believe my health is any of your business, my lady.”
Jane sighed. She held out a hand. “Please, my name is Jane. There is no need for the title. I don’t wish for us to remain formal with each other.”
“Very well.” He took her hand and briefly squeezed her fingers. “Phineas, but I prefer Finn.”
“Ooh, so do I, but Phineas is interesting too.”
The corners of his lips twitched with the beginnings of a smile. “I’m merely glad that I didn’t land my younger brother’s name of Francis Hildebrand.”
She snorted but composed herself when a man in a Parisian-style apron approached them. He set a tea service on the table along with the typical pastries and a small silver tray for oval-shaped chocolates. Each one was decorated with sugared flower petals.
Alone again, she poured out a cup of tea. “Shall we talk about you? I find you fascinating despite your dedication to an off-putting attitude.” When she handed him the dainty china cup, their fingers brushed.
Dratted gloves.
“I’d rather not. For the time being, you know everything about me that you need to.”
“Very well.” He was also stubborn as a mule. After filling a small plate with all her favorite sweets, she took a sip of tea. “I have two older brothers. One is a surgeon while the other is interested in everything from surgery to psychology to biology.”
“Do I really need subjected to your history?” Though he eyed one of the chocolates, he sipped his tea instead.
“Perhaps not, but I refuse to sit here in cold silence merely because you’re in another rotten mood. God only knows why this time.” She shot him a smile. “I’m a bit awkward talking to men.”
“Is that right?” One of his midnight eyebrows rose. “I hadn’t noticed.” Sarcasm fairly dripped from his words, but he grinned. That was a good sign.
“It’s true. One would think that after I’d been engaged twice, I wouldn’t have such a problem, but I do.” She shrugged and plucked a honey cake from her plate. In two bites, it was gone. “My first fiancé died tragically while riding his horse in Hyde Park. I was two and twenty at the time. Young with my head in the clouds. I thought I would have years with him, and we’d live happily ever after.”
Why did she disclose such secrets to this man she hardly knew? From his stiff body language, he didn’t care one whit about her.
“Ah, now I understand why you’re partial to fairy stories and why you reference them often.” There was no mockery in the words, but his eyes held a light of interest. “I imagine you were heartbroken.”
“I was.” She took a gulp of tea as unexpected tears formed in her throat. “In fact, I thought my life had ended.” A trace of heat pushed into her cheeks. “Like I said, I was young and thought my world—and chances—had ended.”
He nodded. “Understandable. What of your second fiancé?”
“I met him once I came out of mourning. He was a soldier and had been invited to a ball I attended. We struck up a conversation. I felt I’d known him forever after those hours.”
“Let me guess, you were engaged soon following.” Finn took a piece of the pretty chocolate, popped it into his mouth, and chewed.
She stared, her attention drawn to his lips and the tiny smear of chocolate at the corner of his mouth. What she wouldn’t give to lick the sweet away. “Yes. I’m not one to hesitate when I want something.” A sigh of relief left her when he dabbed at smudge and it came away on his linen napkin. “I had two glorious weeks with him before he was sent to the Continent to fight Napoleon.”
“He died there, didn’t he?”
“Yes.” She nodded. “During the Battle of Toulouse.” The bit of pastry she’d chewed tasted of sawdust. Her belly knotted as a wave of grief rose up to crash over her so hard, she gasped. “One doesn’t quite forget the dead, but as soon as the grief has been carefully tucked away, it surfaces again.”
“This is a truth none of us can escape.” Finn’s eyes took on a faraway look. “So many men left on so many battlefields. Never will their bodies return home again.” He touched his waistcoat pocket with his right hand while an expression of such sadness lined his face that tears filled her eyes at the sight. “None of us wanted to fight, but we weren’t given a choice.”
“Too many men thought the wars were a lark. William assumed he’d be back in a year.” Of course he wasn’t, and sporadic letters weren’t the same as having the man home in person.
“In the three years since he’d died, you haven’t tried for a third engagement?”