Heat sneaked up the back of his neck, due to desire or shame he couldn’t say. Both held him in their grip, and at least with them present, he had a good chance of keeping depression at bay. It was when he was alone that the blackness would strike. Why the thoughts of doing anything carnal now? Suddenly needing something to do with his hands, he fussed with the folds of his cravat and fiddled with the buttons of his jacket. Perhaps he should record her description in his notebook. He had a feeling that until he rid her from his system by writing, she would continue to haunt him.
Then another thought occurred that cheered him immensely. On the page, he could do whatever he wanted with a character who strongly resembled her. Why had it not occurred to him before?
“Oh, there you are, Phineas.”
He jerked his head in the direction of his mother’s voice as she bore down on him with a young lady in tow. Thoughts of Lady Jane—real or imagined—scattered. “I want you to meet the Honorable Lillian St. Augustus. I talked about you so much to her that she had to meet you.” A hopeful note resonated within his mother’s breezy tones.
Oh, kill me now.Finn glanced at the slim blonde with the wide blue eyes that reflected both fear and disgust. Of course they did. The one person he’d met tonight who hadn’t showed such a reaction was the talkative Lady Jane. Why was that? But under his mother’s scrutiny, he elected to do the pretty instead of dwell. Extending a hand, he reached to take one of Miss St. Augustus’. She tugged it away before he could draw her fingers to his lips. Ungrateful debutante. It crumbled the foundation of his faith in humanity. “Good evening, Miss St. Augustus. I trust you’re enjoying yourself.” Honestly, he didn’t care. If a person couldn’t see past his chair, he didn’t wish to further their acquaintance. His chest tightened. What he wouldn’t give to have Wellington in his lap right now.
“I am.” While he narrowed his eyes at her high-pitched voice, she glanced at his mother, who gave her a nod. “Uh, would you like to talk over punch?” Her expression suggested she’d rather do twelve other things instead of spending one more second in his company.
“Ah.” Now he understood. She was desperate to wed before the Season began or her father needed an infusion of coin, which meant she had to attract a wealthy man, regardless of whether said man could walk. I’m so sick of artifice. Finn swallowed down the sour cynicism in his throat. “No, thank you. I find I’m fatigued at the moment and will make my goodbyes shortly.”
It wasn’t a lie. If it hadn’t been for Lady Jane’s delay, he would already have done it.
Relief flitted across Miss Augustus’ expression. Really, she should learn how to school her expression better. Before she could answer, his mother sailed in.
“You’ve only just arrived, Finn.” She frowned. “Won’t you stay a bit longer? It’s good for you.”
“So is not being here. Sorry to disappoint you.” He looked at the young woman. “Enjoy your evening, Miss Augustus.” Then he wheeled away from the knot of people as well as Lady Jane and her growing circle of eager admirers. The blonde didn’t hold his attention like a certain redhead.
“Coward.”
Perhaps it was his own conscience who berated him.
“I can’t believe you’re leaving.”
No, it was her. The softly uttered words in her voice gave him pause. He stopped the effort of moving his chair forward. The baby fine hairs on the back of his neck prickled. “I have never acted the coward in all my life.” Except the day when he hesitated on the battlefield on his way to push his best friend out of harm’s way.
Lady Jane came into his sight line. Faint annoyance framed her mouth. “No? Well you’re certainly acting like it now.” She propped her gloved hands on her rounded hips and stared him down. “You didn’t tell me goodbye. That was rude.”
“You were otherwise engaged.” He shrugged. “Besides, I’m not a very likable fellow.” She knew him not at all and he wished to keep it that way. The less she discovered of him, the less of a mess he’d have to overcome to maintain a friendship. Not that he wanted one.
“You certainly aren’t in this moment.”
“Then let me take my leave.”
She lowered her voice as she stepped to the side. “Anxious to return to that troll bridge?”
“Well, I’m fairly certain this Bath chair won’t turn into a pumpkin at midnight, so I suppose, yes I am.” The corners of his mouth twitched with the urge to grin. If she wished to needle him, he wouldn’t go down without a fight.
One of her finely feathered eyebrows rose. “So bent on keeping people away before they can make their own decisions about you?”
“It’s easier that way.”
“Going through challenges gives a man strength and the ability to press onward.” She shook her head. Disappointment clouded her eyes for a second, gone at her next blink. “I wasn’t done talking to you, so this isn’t our last meeting, Major Storme.”
Finn’s lower jaw dropped slightly open as his mind spun. “Why is that?” Despite himself, he truly wanted to know what this maddening woman was thinking.
A soft smile curved her lips, and his gaze once again dropped to her mouth. “I’m going to show you that you still have worth, even if you don’t believe it.” With a saucy wink, Lady Jane turned on her heel and then disappeared into another knot of laughing, chatting people.
Finn stared at the empty space she’d previously occupied. What the devil was wrong with the woman that she wished to further their acquaintance?
“Who were you talking with? She’s quite striking,” his mother said as she joined him.
“And quite assertive,” he murmured, but his interest had been piqued for the moment. “As for who she is, I suppose we’ll discover that together. It was too difficult for me to ask many questions tonight.”
A band of worry tightened his chest. Did he even wish to encourage her?