“And look at the price you’re paying for it.”
“For the hope it gives me that maybe there is some small chance, however improbable it may seem, that they’re still alive, I’d do it again.”
He hugged her close, needing to feel her against him and reassure himself that she was okay. He gave her a soft kiss, then sat back in the seat. “I hate this.”
A soft chuckle burst out of her. “Me, too. Being blind and deaf for even that short time scared me half to death. I felt lost and helpless.”
“No driving. At least for a few days until you figure out how you feel and if it’s safe.”
“Okay. But I need to pick up my car from where I left it at the search site. And I need to go into work.”
“My brothers drove out to get your car. It’ll be at my house when we get home. Shelby and I can take youwhere you want to go, but I would really like it if you did what the doctor said and rest.”
“I will. But he didn’t say I needed to stay in bed. I’ll be careful and aware of how my body feels. I won’t work full-time, but I have some clients who have appointments coming up that I don’t want to cancel. Plus, I need to check on the new shop and be sure the contractor is ready to start the remodel on time.”
“Cyn...”
She squeezed his hand. “I know you’re worried. So am I. But I have to live my life, Hunt, and that includes being with you without you treating me like I’m about to die.”
“You couldn’t fucking see.”
She slid out of bed and into his lap, dragging the IV line with her. “I know. But I’m okay now. I’ll follow the doctor’s suggestions to keep it from happening again. I’m talking a couple hours at work here and there over the next few days. The rest of the time, I’ll chill. I promise. But I am not glass. You don’t have to handle me with care. I proved that to you this morning.”
He’d taken her in a rough and wild way. “Can you just let me do it for a few days until I know you’re okay?”
“We’ll see how it goes.”
He rolled his eyes, knowing that was the best he was going to get.
“Tell me about your day,” she prompted, changing the subject.
Since he had her in his lap and arms, he settled her against him. “It started off with a bang this morning,” he teased. He traced one of the butterfly tattoos that looked like it was fluttering across her wrist. He’dseen all of them last night because he’d made a point to search them all out on her body. This one had a pair of scissors held in its little legs. “Why butterflies?”
“I thought we were talking about your day.”
“Indulge me. I want to know about you.”
“I love butterflies. They start as one thing and transform into something else. It reminds me that nothing stays the same. Something beautiful can come from something ordinary.”
“I never thought about it, but yeah, there’s beauty in that.”
She grinned. “The tattoos started with a guy.”
Hunt groaned and rolled his eyes. “Never mind. I don’t want to know.”
Cyn kissed his neck. “Listen.”
He gave her a soft squeeze to let her know she had his full attention.
“He was the first boy I ever loved. Or at least what I thought was love at the time. I wanted to be a hairdresser to the stars. He wanted to be a singer-songwriter. Man, he had such a great voice. And the broken kind of soul that made his lyrics deep and edgy and heart-wrenching.”
“What happened to him?”
“He self-medicated his depression, even though I begged him to talk to a counselor and see a doctor. He called me one night, drunk and whatever and crying, telling me he couldn’t take feeling lost and alone and empty anymore. I told him he had me. He had my heart. But then all I heard was deafening silence.” She wiped a tear from her face. “He hung himself wearing the butterfly pin I’d stuck on his shirtsleeve one day at school.He’d worn it on his shirtsleeve every day after that.” She tugged down the gown to show him the butterfly on her arm. “So I tattooed one on my arm with a red heart in one wing and his name in the other.”
He looked closely at the blue butterfly. The red heart was easy to see. But the name written in black ink within the blue was harder to make out.
“Leo,” she said. “I’ve heard the rumor, Wilde. That the tattoos all have my lovers’ names in them. The truth is, I never slept with Leo. I regret that we didn’t share that before he was gone.”