“Chase and I had dinner together last night.” The giddiness inside her came out with that blurted admission.
“So you two are finally dating.” Laura married her high school sweetheart ten years ago and lived a happy life with her adoring husband and their two boys. Everyone loved her because of her bright, cheerful personality. It didn’t hurt that her mom and dad ran the diner and everyone adored them, too.
Shelby was the opposite of Laura. Quiet. Guarded. And truthfully, sometimes too lost in her grandparents’ notion that she was something to be hidden and ignored.
“Chase is not and never will be mine.”
Laura arched a brow. “Are you worried about him using again?”
“No. Yes. I don’t know. He’s dealing with a lot right now. The last thing he needs is me pushing my feelings on him.”
“Maybe he’d be happy to know you have feelings for him,” Laura suggested, like that could be a real thing. “Shelby, as your friend, I’m going to say something I feel you should know.”
“Okay.” Maybe she didn’t want to hear this.
Laura put her hand on Shelby’s arm. “Anyone you want to be with would be lucky to have you.”
Oh, that made Shelby’s chest tight and her heart soar.
“You’re sweet and kind,” Laura said, “and I would kill for your body, because let me tell you, two babies make everything drop, and that last ten pounds just never goes away.”
Shelby grinned. “I don’t see your husband complaining, or you when you come in here smiling all the time.”
“My man likes to wake me up and send me on my way a happy girl. Still, we’re talking about you, and how you don’t put yourself out there. You’ve told me a few things about how growing up with your grandparents left you feeling like you didn’t matter. But you deserve every happiness, even if they made you feel like you don’t because of what happened to your mom. And really, that makes no sense. What happened to her was tragic, but that doesn’t have anything to do with you.”
“I know that. Now. But growing up, it felt like somehow it was my fault. And I try to make myself believe that my grandparents’ feelings toward me were their grief and anger over what happened, but still, when you’re treated like that for so long, it just somehow becomes who you are.”
“Then shift your focus. That guy, and probably Chase for that matter, didn’t look at you that way. He didn’t treat you that way. He thought you were attractive and nice and worth asking out on a date.”
“I guess so.”
“And Chase, you never talk about your night with him, but it had to be something, because I know you want more with him. You told me you asked him to be with you that night.”
It had been the boldest thing she’d ever done.
Laura leaned in and held her gaze. “He wouldn’t have said yes if he didn’t want to be with you, too.”
They were both drunk. But Chase had made that night so special. He didn’t just take what he wanted and leave. He stayed for more. Lots more.
“Chase and I... we’re complicated.”
“Maybe. But how much of that is because you keep him at arm’s length the way you do other people? Hell, it took months before you felt comfortable talking about more than work and the weather with me.” Laura was teasing, but she was right.
With everyone Shelby came into contact with, she kept the interactions to everyday pleasantries. Working with Laura allowed her time to get over her insecurities and see that Laura really liked her and wouldn’t see her past as some stain on her. When it came to talking about their kids, they connected so easily. Laura had been a huge help when it came to raising Eliza and figuring out what to do for her when Shelby got overwhelmed and felt inadequate. Laura assured her every parent felt that way and always offered up suggestions for whatever dilemma Shelby faced.
“It’s easier talking to you than Chase. I don’t want to screw that up because we have a kid to raise together.”
“All I’m saying, Shelby, is that being a mom is great, but you deserve more. I know you’re lonely. How can you not be when you give so much to your daughter, your clients, those few of us you call friends? You deserve someone in your life who takes care of you.”
Shelby had a hard time even imagining it.
“I know you have feelings for Chase, and that’s complicated because of his situation. You’re worried about him relapsing, and you should be. It’s a valid concern. But don’t use it as an excuse not to be honest with yourself and him about what you want and need out of the relationship. Because whether you realize it or not, you are in one with him. You just have to decide and allow yourself to be as close as you want to be with him.”
“You make it sound so easy.”
“I know it’s not. But it’s also not as hard as you think.”
Shelby couldn’t help but think about it. “Thank you for the advice and insight. I’ll keep it in mind.” She checked the time. “I have to pick up Eliza. See you tomorrow.”