He grinned for the first time in a long time, and aspark of hope lit in his chest. Then he followed her back down the hall toward the family room and kitchen.
She stopped outside one of the two bedroom doors they’d passed on the way to the master bedroom. “I think you should make this Eliza’s room. It has really great light and a fantastic view of the trees out the window.”
Stunned, he stared at the empty room and mentally decorated it with a toddler bed, a soft rug for her to play on, and something fun on the walls to make the place seem cheerful. “You’ll really let her stay here with me sometimes?”
“Yes. Eventually. But that’s a long talk we’ll have soon about shared custody and taking care of her. After what happened, and the fact you’re still working on setting up a new life for yourself, I hope you understand it’s going to be a slow process.”
Yeah, he didn’t really know how to take care of Eliza on his own. But he’d learn. And the best way to do that was to spend time with Eliza—and her pretty mom.
Chapter Four
Shelby and Chase pulled up in front of the babysitter’s house. He drove, giving her time to think about everything that happened between them.
He looked a hell of a lot better than his first day home after being discharged from the army, when she thought he’d be hopeful about starting a new life and being a dad to Eliza. But he’d still been healing from his wounds, in pain physically and emotionally, after being shot and probably losing more friends, though he never went into any depth about his experiences overseas. Eliza was the only thing that really made him smile and leave his apartment to do things other than wallowing on the couch, drinking and taking far more than the prescribed amount of pain meds.
At first, he always seemed happy to see Eliza. But the more time that passed, the worse he got.
He made Shelby the bad guy, because she wouldn’t allow him to see his daughter, and she didn’t want that to happen again.
He swore this time would be different. He’d even said he wanted them to be a family. While that made her heart beat faster and her wish for things that seemedimpossible, she understood that Chase wanted them to raise Eliza together. She connected them.
He’d used Eliza as a lifeline when he was using, desperate to see her, so he had something good in his life when he was destroying it at the same time.
Eliza couldn’t be the glue that held Chase together. He needed to find that within himself and build a new life, one that gave him a sense of accomplishment and satisfaction.
That’s why she’d gotten him the house and property. He needed a solid starting point. What he did with it was on him. Success or failure was up to him.
She loved that she’d been able to shock him with her surprise. She’d never done anything so daring. But when she heard about the property and knew that she had a rare favor she could call in at the courthouse, she didn’t hesitate to snap up the land.
She wanted Chase to have a safe and nice place to live so that Eliza could have longer visits with him. A drab apartment or motel room wasn’t going to cut it. And after he’d served his country, had spent all his money on rehab to be better for himself and Eliza, and had given his bonuses to his family to save their ranch, he deserved something good to happen to him.
She couldn’t believe he’d brought up that night. Her cheeks heated just thinking about it.
Why now? They’d never spoken about it.
She understood it had been a onetime thing. She didn’t expect Chase to want her just because they had a child. But it seemed like that night meant something to him. Though maybe she was reading too much into it. Growing up in a home with two people who obviously loved each other, but were cold to her, she’d internalizedhow much she wasn’t wanted. She was a burden to her grandparents. An obligation.
She didn’t want to be that to Chase.
The tie that bound them together was the only thing they needed to focus on. Eliza. Shelby appreciated so much that Chase stepped up immediately and took responsibility for Eliza. And even though he’d been serving overseas, he took every opportunity to call, video chat, and engage with Eliza over the webcam.
Shelby thought it sweet and probably cathartic for him to talk to someone who hadn’t learned to talk back. He’d taken the time and made a point to let Eliza hear him and feel his presence during those calls. He may not have been with her, but he’d found a way to connect with her.
Now, every time she heard his voice, she yelled, “Daddy.”Dadahad been her first word.
And they talked, too. Shelby always gave him an update when he managed to link in during the morning or evening. She let him know about Eliza’s checkups and the new things she was doing. When Eliza started babbling, crawling, and toddling, Shelby made sure he got to see it.
She remembered so many calls where she’d see Chase’s haggard and weary face and how he’d smile the second he saw Eliza, even if she was asleep.
She hated that his family thought she lied about Eliza’s paternity. She wondered if Chase questioned it as well, but simply didn’t care, because he needed Eliza to be his so he had something good in his life.
She wondered how much of their night together he actually remembered. They were up practically the whole night. He had to be as sober as her by the earlymorning light when they’d run out of condoms, rolled the dice, and said thank you and goodbye with their bodies. There’d been no thought to consequences because they were so caught up in each other before she silently slipped out of bed, dressed, and left without a word exchanged between them.
She’d left a piece of herself with him.
She’d taken a piece of him with her.
But did he believe that?