2
Ben
I wantednothing more than to know that Raven was safe, but I was dreading seeing her in class today. My wolf wasn't responding and I was worried about what the thief had done to her.
They sent me to the hospital after the incident but kicked me out after a few hours. No matter what I did, I couldn't get in to see Raven. The last several days had been non-stop research into what to do about a shifter who can't shift.
It was terrifying not feeling my inner wolf. It was as if it was completely gone. The emptiness was awful. Like part of me died and yet I had to stay living with both the guilt and emptiness of that vacancy.
Raven had to be going through the same thing if her magic was also missing. But I didn't know yet. Nobody would tell me. So here I was, sitting and waiting in Magical Theory, hoping for some sign that she was okay.
When she walked through the door, her scent hit me like a slap on the face. I didn't even have to look up to see her. I knew it was her. My heart leaped and breathed a sigh of relief. She was safe, at least that I knew.
I still wanted her, with everything I was, but I couldn't have her.
I knew I had to resist. I wasn't good for her. I wasn't good for anyone. The visit from my father the night after the Thief attacked was reminder enough of why I needed to stay away from her.
My family was rich and powerful, that was true. But I was the first student in my family to gain entry to this school. Partially because they didn't used to allow shifters but mostly because the work my family did wasn't legal. None of it. Even the legit businesses were fronts for shady things.
But somehow, my dad had managed to pull strings. And he was deadly serious about me being the upstanding representative of the family he needed. With me gaining a diploma from the Academy of the Elites, it raised our status. Gave him entry to things he was previously barred from.
Plus, it was my only shot at getting away from the family and following my own path. Me going full legit made my dad look better so he was on board. But for that to happen, I couldn't afford to get kicked out. I had to pass the trials and I had to graduate.
If I didn't, well, my dad had a way of making things that hurt his business disappear and I wasn't so sure being his only son was protection enough for me.
I couldn't add that to Raven's plate. I couldn't drag her into all of this. Especially if I went down. My dad was already blaming her enough as it was. I'd chased after some girl and it cost me the ability to shift.
The only way I got him to stop threatening her was to agree to avoid her. There was no way I was going to tell him she was my mate. And mate or no, I couldn't be with her.
Raven's eyes locked on mine and a smile formed on her lips. My heart pounded against my ribs. It would have been easier if she was mad at me. Easier if she yelled at me and told me to stay away. Instead, she was walking right toward me.
"Ben, I was so worried," she said.
I waved my hand. "Nothing to worry about here."
Her brow furrowed, clearly reading my attempt at nonchalance. I wasn't doing the best job of not letting her get to me. Her honeydew scent made my temperature rise and my pulse raced. I shouldn't be feeling this kind of a reaction to her with my wolf dormant. How was she getting to me this much?
"Thank you for what you did in there," she said. "I'm so glad you weren't hurt."
"I was in the right place at the right time," I said, the words killing me. I wanted to touch her, pull her against me, check her body for any damage done by the Thief's lightning. I could feel my desire clawing against my chest, begging for release.
"You came for me," she said. "I know you did, and I don't know how I can repay you."
"No need," I said. "Class is going to start."
She frowned, a look of heartbreak in her eyes. It made my chest tighten. It took all of my willpower not to take it all back. I'd dismissed her heartlessly. She'd never forgive me for this. But it was better than her life being in danger. It was the only way.