“It couldn’t have been worse than growing up here, Ma,” I said.
“Trust me, there are things worse than Wolf Creek and the suffering we had here.” She sipped her coffee. “You’re better off without him.”
“That doesn’t make any sense. He wouldn’t have even known I couldn’t shift until I was nineteen. I’d have had a whole lifetime to feel loved and safe. How could you deprive me of that?” All the good feelings about my mom were gone now. Why would she do that to her unborn child and how had she kept this from me all these years?
“He would have known far sooner and things would have ended badly for both of us,” she said. “Promise me, you will never go looking for your father. He’d bring you nothing but pain.”
“How could I? I know nothing about him,” I said.
“Good.” She walked out of the kitchen and paused in front of her bedroom door. “Be safe out there.”
I was still standing in the kitchen with my untouched coffee when she closed the door behind her. “That’s it? No goodbye?”
It wasn’t like I expected anything touching or memorable, but I expected something other than this. What was I supposed to do with this information? Why tell me about my dad now? And how the fuck could living with a father and mother outside of this shit hole be worse than having the crap beat out of me every week?
Furious, I set the cup on the counter and stormed back into my room. It was time to go. I wasn’t sure when the magic barrier would let me pass but I wasn’t going to wait here. My guess was sometime after moonrise, I could walk right out of here but I could use any head start I could get.
Quickly, I made myself a peanut butter sandwich and grabbed a bunch of snacks to get me through the next couple of days in case Wolf Creek was a longer walk from civilization than I knew.
That was another shitty thing about this place. I had no idea where we were geographically. I knew we were in the United States and that we got mild winters with some snow and hot summers, but other than that, I was clueless. I could be days away from a hotel or I could walk right into a bustling metropolis. No matter how many adults I asked, nobody would tell me the details.
I was done with the secrets. Done with the magic. I was going to find my way out of here and start living my normal, boring, human life.
When I stepped out of my door, I was greeted by three familiar faces. Tyler, and his two best goons, Julian and Kyle, were waiting right out front of my trailer.
“How am I supposed to avoid you when you show up at my house?” I demanded. “I’m not in the mood for any of your games, Tyler.”
“I had a feeling you might do something like this. You're going to run,” Tyler said.
“I told you I was going to run. That was always my plan. You knew that. You're the one who told me to do it.” I glared at Tyler, totally confused and super pissed about the way he was behaving. What was going through his head? He told me to get out of here. And he told me to avoid him. Yet, he shows up at my house first thing in the morning on the day of the First Moon Ceremony. Every interaction I had with Tyler was getting more confusing by the second.
“My dad says everyone has to be at the ceremony or it’ll displease the gods. I'm here to make sure you attend.” Tyler, to his credit, looked like he would rather be anywhere else but standing here playing errand boy for his dad. I wished the same could be said about his friends, but their grins and tense body language told me they were hoping I wasn't going to go down without a fight.
I had two choices. Try to fight all three of them and lose badly, or agree to go along with it. There was a possibility I could still run if they didn’t stick around to babysit me.
“Fine.” I took a step back, giving some distance between the three of them.
“I'm supposed to bring you tonight. You're the only one that might ruin it.” Tyler moved closer to me, his expression serious.
“After a week of warning me to stay away from you, you want to spend more time with me? What is it, Tyler?” I probably should have kept my mouth shut but in my defense, I was already out of this place in my head.
“What is she talking about, Ty?” Julian asked.
“Keeping me away from your friends, too. What the fuck is going on, Tyler? Is this really about your dad?”
“Don’t push me, Lola.” Tyler growled.
“Tyler, teach her some manners,” Julian said. He inched closer to me and I could practically feel his wolf pacing. The thought startled me. I couldn’t communicate with the pack the way the others could. I’d heard we could sense wolves, feel emotions, connect in ways humans couldn’t. But that was never an option for me.
I shook my head, trying to send the confusing thought away. It had to be in my imagination.
“If she’s unconscious, she can’t participate. My dad was clear that she has to be there. All the new wolves do,” Tyler said.
“She’s not a wolf. She’s not even a human. She’s an abomination and she shouldn’t even have been left alive,” Julian said.
I’d heard the words my whole life but they stung more today for some reason. I was so close to getting out of here and this was exactly why. Usually, I could use the hatred thrown my way as fuel, but today there was already so much unwanted nostalgia.
“I told you, she’s still connected to the pack,” Tyler said. “My dad said she can’t be killed before the ceremony, or it could threaten the pack.”