The lecture ends, and I look down at the screen of the donor laptop for the day’s assignment. Most of the people in my flunkie classes aren’t here for learning, and they start goofing off, throwing spitballs and pencils at the ceiling, listening to music or getting on their phones. A few of us know that’s not the way out, and we open the homework, ready to get a jump on things.
A message pops up on my screen, some kind of messenger app I didn’t even know was on the school computers. It’s an old-school one calledOnlyWordsthat’s supposed to look retro, a little box with square green letters blinking at me with a message.
MrD: Hello Darling.
The school really should invest in a better firewall to keep the creepers out. I’m about to X out of the little box when a second message pops up after the first.
MrD: I have a proposal for you.
I roll my eyes to myself and decide to engage. There are only 5 minutes left in class, anyway. I won’t even be able to finish a single problem of the homework. I don’t bother making a messenger handle, just type in the box to reply. I may not be getting a scholarship to Yale anytime soon, but I’m smart enough to know not to trust men on the internet. Doesn’t mean it’s not fun to fuck with them.
Faulkner189: Mr. D? Really? That’s original.
MrD: You could call me Big D if you’d rather.
Barf. Just like I thought, some creeper hacking into the school computers to harass girls. Just about sums up the Faulkner High experience.
Faulkner189: Rnt u going to ask if I like older men?
MrD: Do you?
Faulkner189: Or if I’m a virgin?
Mr. D: Are you?
Faulkner189: In case u couldn’t tell, Im on a school computer. UR prolly going to get arrested
MrD: I don’t think so.
Faulkner189: I seriously doubt ur as smart as u think u r
MrD: That’s where you’re wrong.
Faulkner189: Well, aren’t we full of ourselves
MrD: Just honest.
Faulkner189: U missed the chance to say I could be full of u 2
MrD: I think you’re the one flirting.
Faulkner189: been there, done that, can predict the lines
MrD: You’ve flirted with older men online?
Faulkner189: ur all the same
MrD: You didn’t answer your questions.
Faulkner189: U 1st
MrD: Don’t like older men, not a virgin.
Faulkner189: Ditto. The real question is, Y R U propositioning underage girls?
MrD: I wasn’t aware that I was.
Faulkner189: U just happened to break into a school computer account to message me & u didn’t know I’d be in school???