For a minute, I don’t think he’s going to answer. But just as we reach the wide doors with the school motto engraved above, he pauses. “You fucked him,” he says under his breath. “While I was in there, dead for all you knew, you were fucking the guy who did that to me. Am I just supposed to forget that?”
I feel like he just slapped me. He’s right—that’s exactly what I did. But I thought I’d atoned for that. I gave up Devlin for him. To prove to him that I was a Dolce, that I wasn’t a traitor.
But he still thinks I am one.
“I was trying to save you,” I say, tears springing to my eyes. “I had to.”
He stares at me hard, his dark gaze shadowing mine. “You didn’t have to like it.”
Without waiting for an answer, he shoves open the doors and strides in, letting the doors swing closed in my face.
I take a deep breath, trying to steady myself. But how do I steady myself when my rock is gone? The earthquake that’s shaken all our lives has broken a fault line between us, and I don’t know if I will ever cross it, if we’ll ever be on the same side again. It’s all I can do not to collapse onto the stairs and sob.
Dolce daughters don’t make public spectacles of themselves, though. Instead, I hold my head just as high as my brother’s, and I let Baron link his arm through mine and escort me into the school like a patrol officer. And I keep on pretending, just like I have for the past year, that everything is fine. That the world isn’t crumbling to ruins around me. That everything is sugarcoated perfection in my little candy-colored world.
I’m relieved when Devlin doesn’t show up first period. Of course, he’s apparently been in jail for a week, so he probably needs time at home. But Colt strolls into sophomore English like he owns the place, as usual. Our eyes meet, and he smirks. I tense, my heart stammering in my chest. This is it. He’s going to cut me down, or issue some new decree, or declare open season on me. I’m the Darling Dog, after all. I know I got lucky in that locker room, that Devlin saved me. Yes, we had an audience I’d rather not have had, but he protected me from them. Without him here… Without his protection from the things his cousins could do to me…
Even though class hasn’t started, and the teacher isn’t even in the room yet, the voices in the room die in an instant when Colt strolls in. Not a whisper breaks the dead silence of the classroom, as if they’re taking the ACT that will determine their future instead of watching some high school drama unfold.
Colt’s gait is slow and lazy as he moves toward me. I know better than to think there’s anything else slow about this boy. I sit up straight, schooling my face into a blank slate even though adrenaline has turned my limbs to mush. He stops in front of my desk. My gaze meets his laughing blue eyes, the ones that crinkle at the corners, hiding the alertness that never leaves them beneath heavy lids. He’s not smiling now, though. Not much. Just a little twist at the corner of his lip, a hint of a crooked smile. Then, he reaches out a fist to me.
I stare at it.
He raises his brows, waiting.
I know Colt’s game. I know I have to do what he wants, or he’ll make it a spectacle. I reach forward and gently bump my fist against his, expecting him to pop me in the face when I let my guard down.
But he just grins and drops into the seat next to mine. Other kids start whispering, still watching. I turn to Colt.
“So, what’s next?” I ask.
He shrugs. “Nothing.”
“But I—.” I break off. I won’t say what I did to Devlin. Not in front of the class.
I may not be able to be with him, but I can’t pretend I don’t care. Not to myself. I owe myself the truth.
“And no more Darling Dog for this one,” Colt says to the class, laying an arm around my shoulder. “That honor went back to your friend Winn-Dixie this morning. Some girls are just born to be dogs. And some…” He trails off, his eyes moving over my face, down my white buttoned blouse and my navy skirt and pumps.
“Go on,” I say, raising my chin and meeting his eyes. At this point, it seems silly that some unsubstantial words have ever been able to cut through my armor.
Colt sits back in his seat and grins, moving his arm to the back of my seat. “You can put dog ears and a collar and a leash on a tigress, but she still ain’t a dog.”
And then I remember how much power words can have. I remember because I used them for evil, and they almost took someone’s life. I remember, because with one little sentence, Colt has set me free. I’m not the Darling Dog anymore. Now, it’s my turn to use my voice to stand up for Dixie.
“What are you saying, man?” asks Shaun, a guy in several of my classes. But I remember him all too well from situations outside the classroom. Shaun ate dogfood in the hall. At the party where Devlin led me around on a leash, Shaun groped me, and I slapped the shit out of him. And later, Shaun tried to grab me again when Devlin wasn’t there to protect me, to keep the others at bay. He doesn’t play football, and he’s not in their crowd, but he’s a hanger-on. He’s not good enough for the Darlings, but he’s good enough for some of their frustrated fangirls, just annoying enough to get their attention on occasion.
“I’m saying,” Colt drawls. “That Crystal’s not the Darling Dog. She never was.”
“Is she a Doll?” Lacey asks, twisting around in her seat and shooting me a resentful glare. She was stripped of her Doll title because of me, and she obviously hasn’t forgotten it.
“Nope,” Colt says.
“Neither are you,” I say to Lacey, tense with anger. I’m so sick of this catty little bitch and her underhanded comments. She huffs and turns away.
“Alright,” Shaun says with a grin. “If she never was the Dog, then she’s fair game.”
“I’m also right fucking here,” I grit out.