Susie looks away, a single tear streaking down her cheek. “It’s none of that, Ed.”
Gentling my voice, I ask, “Then what is it?”
She takes a deep breath and finally meets my gaze. “My mom told me that you don’t want to have children.”
I blink at her, dumbfounded. “Wait, what?”
Susie looks absolutely miserable, wringing her hands. “She told me about how you don’t want kids because of the burden it puts on the Earth. And I don’t disagree,” she says in a suddenly tired voice. “Our planet is groaning under the weight of supporting too many people, and I can see why you wouldn’t want to contribute to that, especially as an avowed conservationist.”
I stare at her, confused.
“Okay, but what does that have anything to do with anything?”
That’s when Susie loses it. “It’s because I’m pregnant, Ed, what else? Can’t you tell?” she semi-screams. “But you’re too much of a psycho environmentalist to want a kid, so what do I do now?”
I’m silent for a few beats as my heart races.
“You’re pregnant?” I finally manage in a stunned tone.
Susie is full-on crying now.
“Yes! Condoms don’t work all the time, and you know we didn’t always use them. Plus, I wasn’t on the pill either. We weren’t planning for this, but it happened, okay? So now what do I do?” she demands angrily.
I pull the curvy girl into my arms and kiss her head as my heart races. “Oh, sweetheart, don’t cry. We’ll figure this out. It’s going to be okay.”
Susie pushes me away, still enraged. “How? I’m having a baby with a man who doesn’t want children! So I’m basically fucked, right?”
I shake my head.
“Don’t rush to conclusions. Yes, some of what Nanette said was true back in the day. But that was ages ago, when we were in high school, and I thought it was my duty not to have children. Overpopulation is hurting this planet, and I swore I would protect Mother Earth any way I could.”
Susie sniffles. “Exactly. So where did I go wrong then?”
I stare into those chocolate eyes, willing her to hear my sincerity.
“That’s what I thought twenty years ago, sweetheart, and I’ve changed. Hell, all of environmental science has changed by leaps and bounds, and it’s a complex area of study with a lot of moving targets, a lot stakeholders, and fantastic new breakthroughs. So yes, overpopulation is a factor in the destruction of the Earth, but it’s not that simple.”
“How so?” she sniffles.
I shrug. “It may surprise you, but the human population is actually on a path to begin trending downwards in the next decade or so because fewer people are having children. So as you can see, it’s not just the discipline itself that’s changed, but literally the underlying direction of change. Twenty years ago, everyone thought the only way to control population overload was to forgo pro-creation altogether. But even without those drastic measures, it appears that the tide’s already turned.”
Susie looks dumbstruck.
“Okay, so what does that mean?”
“What I’m telling you is that the old Ed from my undergraduate years was absolutely opposed to having kids. Hell no, over my dead body. But now, everything leading to that decision is no longer the same, so yes, I’m actually happy to be a dad. Or an expectant dad, I should say.”
She stares at me, her lower lip trembling.
“Are you serious?”
I nod.
“Yes, Susie. You’re the best thing to have ever happened to me, sweet girl, and honestly, I thought that at my age, fatherhood was no longer in the picture. But now, you’re giving me something when I thought the opportunity had already passed me by. I love you, Susie, and I’m beyond excited that we’re expecting a child.”
A waterfall of tears begin to gush then, as she sniffles and then buries her face in my neck.
“I love you, too,” she sobs. “I thought I was going to be a single mom. I thought I was going to be that girl with the big belly that everyone whispers about. You know, the one that parents warn their daughters not to become.”
I pull her into my arms once again and kiss her passionately.
“No, that’s not you at all,” I growl. “I would never let that happen because I want you, honey. You and the child both.”
With that, I place my hand on the swell of her tummy where my baby is growing, and feel another tide of love consume my heart. This is not what I expected when a homeless woman showed up on my front stoop, but I’m grateful that Susie arrived because after some wild fireworks, this is where she belongs: with me, in my arms, safe, loved, and most of all, wanted.
EPILOGUE
Susie
Six months later.
I lay the remote on my huge belly once I find the cooking channel on TV and settle deeper into the couch with my feet up and my back propped against a couple cushions. Ah, this is the life! How can a girl be luckier than me?