Josh raises his head to look at me, and our eyes lock. He seems a little surprised, and at the same time, I see a hint of a smile on his face.
"I want to taste you," he whispers, not looking away for a second, and then slowly pulls my pants lower with his hands.
"No, Josh, don't do this, I..." I don't know what to say, embarrassed of myself, trying to squeeze my legs together, but he doesn't let me, holding them with his body.
I'm afraid. No, scratch that; I'm terrified to death.
But what am I afraid of? That he's going to kiss methere, but I won't come? But I have already told him that I can't climax, so he knows. No matter how hard I try, no matter how much pleasure I get when I touch myself, I can never reach the peak.
"I tried this with Chad, and it didn't, it didn't..." I start with a trembling voice.
"I don't want to hear about your shitty boyfriend, Kendall," he roars in response angrily without letting me finish.
I shut my eyes deeply, embarrassed even more now, praying to be able to disappear this second.
"Look at me, Kendall," he says strictly, but I do not listen, shaking my head with my eyes closed.
Josh lets go of my waistband and moves closer to my face, cupping my chin between his fingers.
"Open your eyes, Sapphire," he asks once again, calmer this time, but I do not listen, trying to shut them even harder.
I'm on the verge of crying, and that's when I realize what exactly I am afraid of. I'm scared that if I try this with Josh and it doesn’t work, then I'll lose all hope that it ever will.
"Open your eyes, Sapphire," he repeats, and I feel his lips touching mine as he speaks. He doesn't kiss me, but his lips brush over mine with every word he pronounces. "Please open your eyes."
And then I do. I open my eyes. He slightly pulls away, and our gazes meet. For a couple of moments, we simply stare at each other.
I hold a breath. My lips tremble, and my eyes are wet, but it seems like he doesn't notice, looking at me as if I'm the only girl in the whole world he wants to be with at this moment.
"It'sme," he continues, emphasizing the word 'me' as if it explains something only us two can understand. "I'mHazel, do you remember? I'myourHazel, Sapphire. You should never be afraid of me. I would never hurt you."
I know he wouldn't, and I was never afraid of him. Even when I hated him for mocking me, I knew he did it for a reason. He was mad at me for something; I just didn't know what the reason was. I still don't know, but somehow it feels like it doesn't matter anymore. It feels like everything between us changed the moment he told me he missed me and wrapped his hand around my waist.
I say nothing, but my body loses its tension, and Josh feels it right away. He leans to kiss my lips for a gentle, barely touchable kiss before going lower to my chest, my belly, and the tip of my scar, which lands on the left side of my hip bone.
I involuntarily moan quietly when his hands move the elastic of my pants to have better access. I grab his hands with mine, digging my nails into his strong shoulders. His lips move lower. At the same time, his hands pull down my pajama pants until they're off and on the floor next to the other clothes.
Josh's fingers trail over my body, stroking the inner side of my thighs. He takes my legs in his arms and throws them on his shoulders, lying on his elbows right over my center.
I feel his breath on my pussy, next to my hole, and on my lower lips, but he doesn't kiss me there right away. At first, he places kisses on my inner thighs, slowly, gently, moving inch by torturous inch closer to my center but still being too far from where I want him the most.
He takes my ass in his palms and squeezes it, but just a little, massaging it. When his lips reach the bend between my leg and my pussy, and I feel his lips touch me there, I tilt my head back and close my eyes, not out of fear this time, but out of anticipation.
I can't believe how easily this man made me feel so desirable, so sensitive, so alive. His every touch, his every move makes me ache for more, makes me dream for this night to never be over.
When I feel a smack of his lips on my pussy, a loud moan escapes my throat, and I grip the sheets in pleasure. He didn't even pull out his tongue yet, but I feel that I'm already melting in his arms.
He brushes his nose over my clit before inhaling deeply, squeezing my ass in his palms at the same time.
"You smell so good, Sapphire," he whispers, diving his face into my center. "You smell so much better than I've imagined."
Before I can process what those words mean, Josh sticks out his tongue, licks my clit, makes a couple of circles around it, and then sucks it into his mouth.
A groan so loud I swear that even our neighbors could hear it escape from the depth of my body, and my legs try to squeeze together but bump into Josh's head.
"So good, Sapphire, so tasty," he whispers, licking my clit, making circles around it, squeezing my ass in his palms, and then pulling away a little to brush his nose over my center again before diving even deeper into me.
My whole body tenses as if electricity is flowing through it and my muscles wouldn't be able to relax even if I wanted them to.