I thought for a moment. It wasn't what I wanted at all. As I looked into his eyes, I knew that what I really wanted was to be back in his arms, but I knew that wasn't possible either. I looked down at the floor and then back up to Spencer. "It's what I want."
Spencer held out his large hand for me to take, but when I hesitated, he asked, "What is it?"
"It's just, if we are going to plan this party together, then it needs to be kept on a professional level."
Spencer looked at me, that cocky grin coming to his lips. "Are you suggesting that I don't know how to work with a woman on a professional level?"
His eyes danced with a look I knew all too well, and I had to bite my bottom lip to hide my smile. "I didn’t say that. I just wanted to remind you."
Spencer looked at me and held out his hand again. I slipped mine into his and, as soon as we touched, a shock ran through my body. "Now, go get your notepad."
Dad was sitting in his favorite chair watching TV when I got home. I dropped my purse by the back door and slipped my shoes off and then walked into the living room and flopped down into the chair.
"You're home late," he said, turning to me.
"I had a lot of work to do today."
"You put your resignation in?" he questioned, throwing a handful of nuts into his mouth and washing them down with a swig of beer.
I knew he was going to start this. I shook my head.
"Ainsley, we talked about this," he said, slamming his bottle down on the table.
"Relax, I put a transfer in. There is no need for me to quit a perfectly fine paying job, especially with Christmas around the corner."
"All right, when do you start in the new position?"
My stomach filled with nerves as he continued to pay attention to me instead of the fishing show he was watching. I wasn't sure what to tell him. I wasn't sure I wanted to tell him.
"Ainsley?"
"After Christmas," I murmured.
"That is over six weeks away. There is no way you are going to be working with this man that long. I fucking told him," Dad barked reaching for his cell phone.
"Dad. It's fine. He needs help to plan the annual Christmas party. The woman in charge of events is off on surgery, and a new person couldn't look after something like this. His hands were tied."
Dad looked at me skeptically. "Ainsley, you have no experience planning anything like that. I don't like this. He's doing this on purpose." I watched as he began to type.
"And I have no experience in the finance department either," I bit out. "Yet I put a transfer in."
Dad looked over the rim of his glasses at me. "Well you can learn," he said, going right back to whatever message he was planning on sending to Spencer.
"Yep, I can. I can also learn how to plan an event. Spencer promised to keep everything strictly professional, and after the holidays he told me he would sign my transfer."
Dad stopped typing. "You know I'll talk to him and make sure, so you better be telling me the truth."
“I am. I promise.” I said and watched as he placed his phone down on the table and turned his attention back to the TV.
Spencer
Ainsley and I had worked diligently over the last two weeks getting all the details down for the Christmas party. I'd behaved myself as promised, working only in a professional manner, a far cry from what we were before, a far cry from where I'd hoped we be by now once again. I missed those moments where our hands touched and our eyes locked. I missed the secret looks we shared in front of other employees, I missed taking her on my desk when we worked late, but most of all, I missed those nights that I held her tenderly in my arms.
I'd searched my soul for a long time after Brittany had left me, always afraid to allow myself to get close to someone, afraid to fall in love with someone for fear of getting hurt. The first time I allowed it, I fell in deep, and now I'm forbidden to be with her, not only by my ex-wife but by her father, the second of which I can honestly say I understand.
I'd spent the last little bit doing more soul searching, and something felt different this morning as I watched her walk into the office. I don't know if it was the fact that I was tired of allowing someone else to dictate to me how I was supposed to feel or what. I’d spent the past twenty years of my life making others happy, while the last eight I'd been miserable, except for the past few months with Ainsley. That alone resonated so loudly with me, and I wasn't having it anymore.
I'd called Ainsley into my office more than usual today, pretending that I couldn't find something on a spreadsheet just so that I could feel her heat beside me. She looked amazing in the tight white sweater dress she wore. She stood beside me showing me what I had been looking for and then walked around to the other side of my desk and stood there.