I bit my bottom lip. I had to tell him the truth of what had happened, and I knew he wasn’t going to like it.
“Cass, I love you baby. I need you in my life.”
He had never said those words before, and now I knew this was going to be harder than I thought. I closed my eyes.
“I’m sorry you walked in on that conversation with May.”
“I’m just praying what I heard you say to May was because he’s missing and not because of something else, Cass.”
I chewed my bottom lip, trying to figure out how to tell him. When I had garnered up enough courage and went to speak, my words betrayed me and the words that came flying out of my mouth I wished I could have swallowed them back down.
“I slept with him.”
“What did you say?” Ray stood up from the chair, clenching his fists together.
“I slept with him, Ray. I didn’t mean for it to happen, but it did.”
Ray stood there, looking at me with a fierce look of hurt in his eyes.
“We’ve been in a relationship for two fucking years, it took me over a year to get you in bed, he comes in, and in a week you’re in fucking bed with him? Did I mean anything to you at all? What the fuck Cass?” he spat.
I didn’t know what to say, but the tears pouring down my cheeks said enough.
“You know, I could tell from the day he showed up at that store, he wanted you and you wanted him. You just didn’t see it until I was out of your fucking way. I should have killed his ass that night instead of leaving like you wanted me to.” His fists clenched with rage.
“I’m sorry, Ray, please don’t hurt me.” I couldn’t look at him anymore. The truth needed to come out whether he wanted to hear it or not. I couldn’t carry it around with me anymore.
“Hope you enjoyed playing house with him while he was here. I don’t want you coming back crying to me when he leaves again. We are over.”
A deep sob escaped my chest, his words slicing through my heart like a hot knife through butter. I watched through teary eyes as he marched over to the door, throwing my coat and boots out into the snow. He stood with the door open, waiting for me to make my exit, and when I did, he slammed the door shut behind me. I stood outside alone, picking up my coat and slipping my socked feet into my boots.
My chest ached as I walked to my car. I wasn’t sure how I made it back to my driveway and don’t remember walking into my home. I barely made it to the bathroom—there was no way I could stop the vomit from rising this time.
Chapter Twenty-Nine
Cass
Exhaustion had finally caughtup to me. I walked into the little kitchen for a much-needed break and some food. I was completely wiped out, both physically and mentally, but I had to be on my game today. The book drive was in full swing, donations pouring in. Even if people didn’t buy anything, it was so nice to see the community coming together. May had been kind enough to send over a couple of her girls to give me a hand when she found out I didn’t have any volunteers. Maggie had sent her daughters to lend me a hand as well.
I rested my head against the wall behind me and sipped on a cup of hot coffee. I hadn’t slept in days. When I couldn’t take the worry anymore, I had finally broken down and gotten in touch with Brody’s boss in the middle of the night to find out they were going to expand the search to the other side of the ski resort. They figured they possibly had gotten turned around and ended up there, there were a few abandoned buildings on that side. This news had calmed me enough to allow me to sleep for a couple of hours.
I poured more hot coffee into my travel mug and grabbed a cookie from the tray I had ordered from the coffee shop for the girls who were helping me. I pulled my cell phone out of my back pocket and went straight to the news. I needed to know if they had found him. The last update from three hours ago said what I already knew. I ate my cookie in silence, reading the words ‘ending the search tomorrow if they are not found’ repeatedly. Tomorrow was Christmas Eve. I kept reading the article until I heard one of the girls calling from the front.
I sighed, rose from the chair, and stepped out front. Two firefighters stood in full uniform at the counter smiling. One of them was carrying a small box under his arm.
“Cass?”
“Yes.”
“It’s nice to meet you, I’m Mark, this is Dan.” Mark said, nodding toward the other man and holding his hand out to me.
“Nice to meet you.”
“Cass, we wanted to stop by. Brody told us all about your book drive and why you are so passionate about what you are doing to help these families. First, we both want to give you our condolences on behalf of the whole department about your husband’s passing. Brody told us the story.”
“Thank you.”
“No, Cass, thank you. You are making such a difference for these families. I want to let you know when Brody first started with us, he set this box out for us to donate. He wanted to be the one to bring this to you today, but under the circumstances, we decided to bring it to you on his behalf.”