8
DYLAN
This timelast year was hell, and some days I’m convinced I’ll wake up back there. As November passes, memories of the touring nightmare a year ago, of being torn inside because I never thought I’d see Sky again, and the reliance on meds to keep me going day to day, edge in. The “what ifs”that annoy Sky join them. What if she hadn’t forgiven me last Christmas? What if I’d died in the hotel room in March? What if Sky changes her mind and walks away? Some evenings after a few drinks, I mumble to Sky how I don’t deserve her, convinced something else will catch up with and ruin us. Sky refuses to let me follow my thoughts down that path and reminds me how fiercely we guard what is ours, us against everybody else.
I learn to push everything out with thoughts of Sky, me, and a baby.
We’re having a freaking baby.
Sky has no idea how difficult it is for me not to tell somebody. She told Tara and that pissed me off, but as Tara’s involved with the wedding and is her best mate, I should’ve expected it. Sky apologised and asked if I wanted to tell one person too, but knowing my big mouth, if I say something to one, I’ll tell everybody.
Mentioning this to the boys is out. I’d feel weird saying the words. Maybe Myf? She’s still travelling, and a text or email isn’t the way I want her to find out. As soon as Sky hits her magic twelve weeks point, I’m telling everybody. Okay, after the wedding, we don’t want any new scrutiny, or we’ll end up with a trail of people following us to Bali.
Sheltered at our place in the country, we don’t meet up with anybody for a couple of weeks. I originally bought the place for solitude, fenced from the world: security gates and staff, the works. Now, I share solitude with Sky and understand what she means about downtime. Yes, the holiday was a whirlwind of new places and experiences to share, but for the first time ever, I welcome the quiet. Following the card from Lily, I was on edge, but she did shit like this before I knew Sky; sent me letters asking to see me. Back then, when nobody responded to her, Lily disappeared for a few months again. What can she do anyway? There’s not exactly much else she can throw to the world that beats a rape allegation.
We considered having the wedding at the house but decided we’re not breathing a word to anybody in the UK apart from Tara. Even Tom doesn’t know yet.
Wedding.
Baby.
How could I think life would go backwards? Everything in my life involves moving on, and that’s the direction I’ll always head now. Even musically, I’m more confident in taking on a solo project. Confident in my ability, but not in broaching the subject with Steve or the band.
I keep in touch with the guys, but I think the break from each other helps as much as the break from the industry. Liam’s happily playing dad, and Bryn’s overseas. Jem’s distracting himself with Ruby Riot, particularly the lead singer.
Or he was. Bryn called this morning to ask me to check on Jem in London. My immediate reaction is panic when I hear he’s ended his relationship with Ruby. I bloody knew this would end up a huge mess. I met her once and couldn’t make my mind up if she was a good or bad thing for him. We barely spoke, Ruby quiet and me distracted by Sky feeling unwell. The lack of tension around Jem compared to the last time I saw him was a good thing, but they’re a weird pair. I agreed with Bryn a relationship isn’t the best idea for Jem right now, and this is exactly why.
I attempt to contact Jem, but he doesn’t answer his phone. In the past I’d stop trying, used to Jem ignoring my calls, but this is different. Recently, the animosity between us retreated halfway to how we were. Friends again, but not in the brotherly way that once underpinned our relationship. Jem even apologised to Sky over his past behaviour towards her, and Jem never apologises to anybody. I’m unsure who was more shocked, Sky or me.
By the evening, I’ve left Jem a stack of messages, and Bryn’s called me again asking what’s happening. I’ve no choice. I need to go to London and check on Jem in case he’s fallen into another of his black holes.
I head off to look for Sky, and she’s in the shower. I sit on the edge of the spa bath in the huge bathroom and watch her through the steamed glass. Sky lathers soap across her body and my blood runs south. This woman has an amazing ability to turn me on without even touching me. Although, the personal peep show I have in front of me would turn on any guy with a pulse.
“Stop perving, Dylan,” calls Sky over the trickling water.
“I’m not here.”
“The glass isn’t totally steamed up, Dylan. I can see you.”
“I know. And I can see you.”
Sky opens the door to the double shower, water running from her damp hair and down her body. Wet. Naked. “What did you want?” she asks.
“Uh.” Suddenly, I can’t remember. She walks naked across the bathroom, dripping onto the floor. Sky grabs my T-shirt and drags me to her, pressing her lips on mine and her damp body soaks the front of my clothes. “You’re wet!”
Sky grins at my unintended double meaning and then brushes her lips against my cheek. “How did you know I was thinking about you in the shower?” She flicks open the button on my jeans. “Shower with me?”
“Sky,” I growl. “That never ends well.”
“Liar. It always ends very well.” Sky presses her wet body against me and my hands slide against her back as I pull her closer. Unable to resist, I smooth a hand across her beautiful, round ass.
I came up here to tell Sky I was going to London tomorrow, not to strip off and indulge in one of our favourite activities.
Screw that, I’ll talk to her later.
* * *
SKY