Chapter Twelve
Vance had given cathartic spankings before—it was one of his favorite kinds to give—but there was something about Lilith that made this one in particular pierce his heart.
Sturdy, sassy little thing who seemed to be an island didn’t just want a daddy but seemed toneedone too. The way she sobbed and clung to him was heart-wrenching but it also made his head swell. They hadn’t known each other very long but she already trusted him to give her that release, see her crumble. It wasn’t easy to hand that over, he knew.
And he didn’t want her to take it back after she’d had her good cry. He’d let her crawl back into her shellacked carapace of black and death and doom and carnage if that’s what she needed to feel safe, but he really hoped she’d let him substitute his own body for her hard candy shell, at least for a little while.
He soothed her until her sobs had turned to sniffles and her shoulders only shook occasionally instead of constantly convulsing. Sweet, sad girl with the weight of her whole world bearing down on her.
A woman like that wasn’t just going to hand her life over to him—she’d been without help for far too long to allow that and besides they were barely more than strangers—but he could hold it while she’d let him. This big bear body had to be good for something.
Lilith rubbed her face on his shirt before blinking up at him. Her mascara and the rest of her makeup was a mess and the sight doubled down his instinct to care for her. Clean her up. Sometimes little girls needed a good cry or they needed to take chances and fall and skin their knees. But they should always have someone to wipe the tears away and to clean and bandage the scrapes afterward.
“Your shirt’s a mess. I’m sorry, I’ll put it in the wash so it doesn’t—”
She shifted on his lap, making like she was going to get up and oh hell no.
“You’re not going anywhere, Lil. The laundry will wait.”
“But—”
She struggled against the iron bars of his arms but he didn’t let her go. If she tapped out that was one thing—and she knew her word to do it—but otherwise he suspected she just needed to struggle. Needed the spoiling and care he wanted to lavish on her to be his choice, his desires, not hers.
“Hey now, little girl. I don’t spank and run, that’s not my style. What kind of daddy would I be if I made you cry and then was all ‘Check ya later’?”
Her plump little body shook with a silent laugh and she smiled while scrubbing a lingering tear away from her face. Softer. In that moment he realized it wasn’t the black that made her hard, it was something else, and he’d do well to remember that.
“A bad one,” she allowed, eyes wide and earnest.
“That’s right. And I may be crap at a lot of things, but I’m a damn good attorney and I’m pretty good daddy so don’t take that away from me, okay?”
“Okay, Daddy.”
Her soft words and the way she snuggled back into his shoulder were so sweet, he felt like his heart was overflowing with sugar. Maybe burnt sugar with its darker-than caramel color and deep, intense flavor.
He hugged her tight again, relishing her sigh as he did, and stroked her pretty hair. He hadn’t noticed before but he could see the roots of her hair at her part. That shade of black was obviously not her natural color but it had just seemed so Lilith he hadn’t thought to project anything else onto her. But there was a stripe of what looked dirty blond close to her scalp. Reminded him of how fragile her defenses actually were. If he could be a little patient…
“What do you like for aftercare?”
Lilith stiffened in his arms and he hated it.Melt for me, poppet, he wanted to tell her. But that was something earned, not demanded. She’d melt if he gave her reason to.
He cuffed the back of her neck with a hand, rubbed the tight muscles of her nape until she softened again.
“Mmm, cuddles.”
“Check,” he said, planting a kiss on her pale, delicate part. “Unless I’m doing it wrong. Am I doing it wrong?”
He bounced his knees a little, eliciting a giggle. “No, Daddy. You’re doing it right. Just right.”
“Good. Anything else besides cuddles?”
“Mmm,” she responded, sounding sleepy and starting to feel like a rag doll in his arms.
Fuck he was stupid. She was probably exhausted. If he knew anything about her, and he fancied he did, she’d probably been up all hours looking for work and checking in on her sister, she’d walked to the grocery store and back, she’d likely lain awake fretting about what the fuck she was going to do now, and she’d just cooked him a really good dinner. Plus there was the matter of the chemical rush from getting spanked, and a crying jag could really wear a little girl out.
“You’ve had a long week. We can talk about it more in the morning. For now, Daddy’s going to put you to bed.”
Lilith went rigid against him again and he tutted at her, digging his fingers deeper into the taut muscles of her neck.