“Are you okay? You look kinda down.”
“I’m good, Daddy. Promise. I love being with you and Papa.”
“I’m glad. We love being with you. But it’s okay to still be sad sometimes. You’re not going to hurt my feelings. Maybe if you tell me what’s up I could help.”
Was she thinking about Judah, that piece of shit? Had they done something while they fucked to make her think of him? To hurt her? He couldn’t stand the idea that—
She shook her head, fiddling with Hopscotch’s paws. “I don’t think there’s anything you can do. You can’t change people’s feelings.”
“That’s true sometimes,” he said carefully.
He couldn’t snap his fingers and make her not anxious, that was for sure. He couldn’t twitch his nose and make Ian calm the fuck down—he’d seriously tried everything. But there were some feelings he could change. Maybe not at this very second, but over the long haul. “But if you’re sad I could try to cheer you up. If you’re worried I could reassure you.”
Cosy looked up at him, blinked before looking down again and tugging at the bow around Hopscotch’s neck. She’d changed it to a purple one.
“You can’t make Ryker like me though,” she muttered. “I’m pretty sure he hates me.”
Was this what it felt like to be stabbed through the heart? This sharp tearing sensation in his chest, the way he felt like his lungs had been paralyzed? It fucking sucked and he wanted to march up to Ryker’s room right now, drag him down the stairs by his ear and make him apologize to Cosy, force him at knifepoint to say he loved her. Of course, that wouldn’t be very convincing, now would it?
So until his emotionally stunted partner got his shit together and could see what was clear to everyone else but him, Hudson would handle this. Try to make it easier on his babygirl who just wanted to be accepted and loved.
“He doesn’t hate you. He doesn’t…” Hudson shook his head, searching for a way to explain. “You know Stella?”
Cosy’s brows gathered. “The cat?”
“Yeah. You know how she follows him around?”
Cosy made a tiny laugh. Alaugh. Had he heard her laugh before? Definitely not. He would’ve remembered because it was like getting struck by lightning. In a good way. The best way.
“Uh, yeah, I noticed. Because cats…they don’t do that.”
“Right? It’s fucking weird. So anyway, first time we saw Stella, she was scrawny and her fur was patchy and she was a mess. Wouldn’t come anywhere near us.”
Cosy wrenched her mouth to the side and looked down. It was true that she wasn’t unlike Stella, but that wasn’t the point Hudson was trying to make. No, he was trying to explain Ryker. As much as one could explain him. The guy was one of his best friends but he wasn’t a simple person.
“Anyway, she wouldn’t come anywhere near us. But I maybe started feeding her.” He shrugged. “You know, leaving some cat food and clean water. I definitely did not get her special bowls with her name on them.”
Cosy laughed again, a little louder but still covering her mouth. It thrilled him even as it made his heart hurt. He wanted to see her smile, wanted to see her teeth. Wanted her to trust him with something he’d always taken for granted. He couldn’t wait to tell Ian.
“After a week, Ian got in on the action. I won’t repeat what Ryker had to say about it because wow.”
Hudson pulled a face.
“What the fuck are you doing? We don’t need a cat. Jesus Christ.”
“But after a few months, Stella was basically living here. I snagged her, took her to the vet, got her vaccinated, all that good stuff. She was kinda scared when she started living inside. Ryker still wanted nothing to do with her. But after she’d been living here for a while, he’d pet her some. Absentmindedly, like it wasn’t a big deal.”
There had been times when he’d seen his friend look up, startled, from what he’d been doing and stop petting her, snatch his hand away as though Stella consisted of flames and not soft fur.
“I don’t know exactly how it happened, but now Stella is basically his. She follows him around, she sleeps tucked between his head and his shoulder at night—”
“She lays across his shoulders like a scarf when he’s on the computer,” Cosy offered, her eyes wide.
“Exactly. Maybe he’s a warlock and that cat is his familiar or some shit but whatever it is, they’re BFFs. All that to say…”
He took Cosy’s hands in his, tiny and still cold. They’d warm her up. He had faith they could. And they would, dammit.
“Give the guy some time,” he implored her. “I can’t tell you exactly how I know, and maybe Ryker doesn’t know himself, but he’s going to love you if he doesn’t already. And once he does, he’ll never let you go.”