I opened it and was greeted with my best friend standing there. She gave me a look that was somewhere between sympathetic and annoyed before she pulled me in for a hug.
I went willingly, needing comfort. My head was a jumbled mess and I wasn’t sure she could help put things into perspective.
“You okay?” she asked.
I nodded and then pulled back. “I’m feeling like maybe I panicked and overreacted.” And in the process, I’d probably made Donovan feel like shit, which I hated.
Kyra closed the door and we made our way into the kitchen. I grabbed the coffee pot and made up our drinks while she took a seat at the breakfast bar.
“So, tell me everything from start to finish.”
I did. I gave her all the details. Every last one. When I was done, she stared at me. “I’m going to tell you what all those toys and devices are for and what they do.”
She pulled out her phone and typed something in before turning the phone back to me. “The cross you saw in the room is called an X-cross. It’s designed to strap someone to it in a spread eagle position.”
“Why?”
“Well, that’s up to the couple to decide. I’ve used it many times. Sometimes a scene partner will use vibrators or dildos on me while I’m chained up. I can’t move and that heightens the situation. There’s something liberating about letting go and allowing someone else to take control.”
I could see the appeal. Donovan had given me full control last night and it had made me feel powerful.
She pulled up another image. “These are nipple clamps. You put them on your nipples and the pain they cause is out of this world. I orgasm so hard every time I use them.”
An odd heat flared in my stomach. “But aren’t they uncomfortable?”
“Yeah, that’s kind of the point though. They make all the blood rush to the tips and when you take them off…” she closed her eyes as if she was locked in a memory. “Best feeling ever.”
I bit my bottom lip. “Okay so what about the cage?”
She shrugged. “Some people like to be degraded. It turns them on. The cage can be used for whatever the couple deems. For sleeping in, for punishment. Everything that happens in these situations is completely consensual, Jessica. You can only be pushed as far as you allow. Safety of the person having these things done to them is imperative. There’s always a safe word that’s used in case you want to stop.”
“I shouldn’t have run off,” I groaned, covering my face with my hands. “I feel so stupid.”
Kyra pried my hands away so that she was looking into my eyes. “You’re not stupid. You’re just innocent. The product of a sheltered, religious home can’t be faulted for not knowing what sex toys are. I don’t blame you and I don’t think Donovan would fault you, either. He’s a good guy. No one has ever said an unkind word about him.” She chuckled. “Guys like him don’t get turned down that often. You probably bruised his ego.”
I winced. “He’s never going to talk to me again.”
“You don’t know that. Go to him and explain. He’ll understand. You’re inexperienced, honey. He’ll know this would have been a shock to you. I’m also a little jealous you have this stunningly handsome man who wants to pleasure you on demand.” She smirked. “I would touch him all day if he’d let me.”
That hit me wrong. I didn’t want Kyra touching him. I didn’t want any other woman to touch him, either, for that matter. I wanted him to be all mine.
“It’s never too late to make amends, you know,” she said, oblivious of my possessive thoughts.
“How do you know that?”
“Because you’re both still breathing.” She laughed. “Go to him. Explain why you freaked. And I have just the apology idea you need. It will make him beg you to stay forever, and ever, and . . .” she let the words trail off as she giggled with excitement.
I didn’t know what she had in mind, but I had a feeling it involved something new and a little bit scary. After what had happened last night, something new and a bit scary was okay with me. I hoped.