I wondered what that would feel like?
I wondered what it would feel like to have him do it to me—
I stopped that thought dead in its tracks. I did not need to be imagining my boss smacking my ass.
“You go there to meet women?” I asked instead.
The thought of him with others made my stomach churn. I didn’t expect him to also be a virgin, but I didn’t want to think about his past conquests either.
He sighed heavily. “Sometimes.”
“Did you intend to buy someone tonight?” I persisted. “Was that why you were there? Were you looking for a virgin?”
“No. I have no interest in virgins, Jessica. The idea doesn’t interest me.”
I tried to ignore the sting of his words, but failed. Did that mean he didn’t want me? “But you bought me,” I pointed out.
“Yes.”
“Why?”
“I already told you it was to protect you.” He huffed out a breath. “Why didn’t you come to me when you realized you needed so much money?”
I pushed my hair back from my face and huddled deeper into the warmth of his jacket. “It didn’t seem prudent to beg for a fifty thousand dollar raise.”
Assistants were not paid close to that—especially not one with as little experience as I had. This was my first job in the field and I was probably about to be fired.
I watched as he scrubbed a hand over his face as he digested the figure I gave him. “Can I ask what it’s for?”
I winced because I was going to have to deflect this. I wasn’t about to tell him about my tragic life and my issues with my sister. I wasn’t ashamed of Krissy, but I didn’t want his sympathy either. I didn’t want him to look at me differently.
“I’d rather you didn’t.” My voice was low when I said it, my eyes going to my interlaced fingers in my lap.
“Okay.” I thought he was going to leave it there and not press, but then he said, “Are you in trouble? Can you at least tell me that?”
“Not the type of trouble you’re thinking,” I said. “I don’t have loan sharks or the mafia after me.”
He didn’t laugh. “How can I help?”
“Paying a hundred grand for my virginity is more than enough help,” I said, trying to lighten the mood. It didn’t help. His jaw got even tighter. “So… hotel? Penthouse? Where are we going?”
I said it lightly, but if I was being honest I was nervous. I was also glad it was Donovan who bought my virginity. Now that the reality was starting to sink in I was realizing it could have been a total stranger’s car I was in the back of—not my insanely hot and pissed boss.
“How’d you know about the penthouse?” he asked.
There wasn’t any heat in the question, but a middling curiosity. Considering how involved I was in his personal and professional life he should have known. “The contract you needed me to bring over to have signed that holiday weekend… it was for a penthouse apartment.”
“Right.” He paused and I wondered what he was thinking. “How about I just take you home?”
For some reason his words stung. It was ludicrous, ridiculous even, to feel upset about the fact that he didn’t want to sleep with me, but I did. He had bought and paid for me. He should have wanted to collect what he was owed.
Why didn’t he?
Was I really that repulsive?
Did he not find me attractive?
Did he not even want my virginity?