I go to leave, but she stops me. “Savannah, I want you to come back in soon so I can get a look at that little peanut. I want to check the heartbeat, make sure this pregnancy is strong from the very beginning.”
“I will, but not without Cole.”
She nods her understanding.
The walk down the long office hallway leaves me holding onto the wall for support. I’ve wanted a baby for so long, and here I am, pregnant again. I fumble with my purse to pull out my cell phone. I stare at it once I’m outside. I’m not sure what to do first. I start to call Cole but stop myself as a dark cloud moves in on my celebration. What if something happens again? Do I want to put him through this? Do I wait and tell him after the three-month mark? Or do tell him now? My mind is spinning. I block everything else out and let my mind wander as I walk to work.
I’m still lost in my own little world when Jake decides to tell me about his date with Graham. His mouth is moving, but I’m not listening. In fact, I somehow lip-read most of my orders. When I don’t respond, I get a tap to the arm. Jake is staring at me like I was supposed to have a reaction to his story.
“That’s great, Jake.” I smile and toss out an empty bottle, replacing it with a new one.
He leans his hip into the bar and crosses his arms. “Is it, now? I wouldn’t think Graham almost getting into a car accident is great.”
“Wait, what?” I shake my head, trying to recall his words.
“No, I’m lying, but see, you’re not listening!” He grabs my shoulders and gives me a little jolt. “What is going on? You’re likeNight of the Living Dead.”
“Sorry,” I say with a weak laugh. “I just have a lot going on.” I wave my hand at my head.
He makes a face. “Anything I can do to help?”
I serve my client and take the credit card, swiping it down the machine. “I wish, but no. I just have to make a decision that I’m not sure how to make.”
Jake gives me a hug, rubbing my back. “If you need me, you know where I am.”
“Thanks. You really have no idea how much I needed to hear that.”
Three days go by, and I’m still stuck in my routine, not sure what to do. Cole has been busy, so we’ve only been texting. He hasn’t noticed my mood change since I saw him last. I go through ups and downs of being extremely happy, to scared to death, to just plan denial that my body would allow me to get pregnant again so fast.
I work my shift in another blur. Poor Jake must think I’m on something. My customers don’t seem to mind so much that I’m not as chatty, which is good because I barely remember my left from my right.
I zip my jacket and step into the chilly air, and before I know what I’m doing, I’m calling a cab. A short while later, I dial again.
“Keith?” I say once he answers. I can tell he’s playing poker because his voice is muffled from his cigar.
“What’s up with you? Everything all right?” I hear Dell hooting in the background about his poker hand.
“Can you do me a favor?”
“Of course.”
“Tell theRambo wanna-beat the gate to let me pass.”
“Wait, you’re here? Hang on.” A moment later, the guy’s radio cracks and he waves me into his little heated booth. “What the hell, Savannah? I’ll come get you. Stay right there!”
“Yes, sir,” I joke, but he doesn’t find it funny and hangs up on me.
Headlights blind the booth as he appears a minute later. He hops out to open the passenger door, and I rush in, seeking the warmth. He turns the car around and glares at me. We pass through the other two gates before he even speaks to me.
“Do I even wanna know how you got here?”
I close my eyes, whispering the answer.
“A cab? A flipping cab!” he yells at me for breaching the house rules, but I stop him.
“I got him to drop me off a mile and a half away. He wasn’t happy about it, but whatever. I hiked in the rest of the way.”
He stops the car in front of the house. His hands grip the steering wheel, and the leather stretches under the force. “You hiked in the middle of the night, in the mountains, where god knows what is out there just to come and visit? Why the hell didn’t you call me or Mark?”