Michaela
The fact that Ihadn’t wanted those eel rolls should have been my first clue. After all, I’d taken my emergency contraceptive like a good little irresponsible girl. Granted, once I’d bought it, I’d forgotten about it for several days, but still, I’d taken it.
I’d been tired for two months, but that hadn’t been my first clue either. Life on the road took its toll on everyone, so feeling run ragged hadn’t been anything new. The bone-deep weariness hadn’t abated when I’d gotten back home, but I’d always needed a while to get reacclimated to the real world, so I hadn’t thought anything of it.
It was my boobs that did it. My brother, Ansel, gave me one of his famous bear hugs. He did this after I put in a special request for it. They were his specialty, and he gave them pretty freely when asked.
“Ouch!” I cried, wiggling from his gloriously warm grasp.
He pulled back, eyebrows drawn in confusion. “I hurt you, Smalls?”
My brother was a behemoth. Before he started his own electronic dance music imprint at Shine Records, he’d played pro-football as an offensive lineman. We shared a father but had different mothers. We both got a kick out of telling strangers we were siblings. They’d look at Ansel, giant and Scandinavian-looking, and then me, petite and Black, and try to figure out how we could share DNA. We weren’t any more complicated than any other blended family, but the ten shades between our respective skin color always threw people for a loop.
I pressed my palm to my breast and winced. “Yeah. For some reason, my boobs are extra sensitive today.”
He cringed. “I don’t want to know about your boobs.”
My hands went to my hips. “You asked.”
My sister-in-law, Rosa, looked me up and down. “The only time my boobs hurt is when I’m pregnant. You have something to tell us, Mic?”
I pulled a sour face. “Nope. I haven’t had sex in so very long.”But the last time I did, it was very much unprotected. Oh shit.
She crossed her arms over her chest. I touched my stomach. My brother looked like he wanted to climb out the nearest window, except his ass was too big and he’d take the entire frame with him if he tried.
“I have extra tests upstairs,” Rosa said.
Now Ansel truly looked panicked. “Why? Why do you have extra tests?”
They had four kids, each more maniacal than the last. My brother had gotten the big snip after Logan came along. Thank goodness. Just this morning, the eighteen-month-old angel-devil baby figured out how to escape the house and get the door of the guest house out back—my house—open. I’d been awakened by him dive-bombing me in bed.
“Don’t worry, big man. They’re leftovers.” Rosa went up on her tiptoes, Ansel bent down, and they met in a sweet little kiss.
I kicked my toe against their hardwood floor. “I don’t want to take a test. I finished school forever ago. Nope. No more tests for me.” I was being childish and firm in my denial. If I was actually pregnant by the man I’d been trying to divorce the past two months...
I squeezed my eyes shut.
Rosa and I went upstairs to her bathroom. Logan was napping, and the other three kids were at summer camp, so the house was eerily quiet. My sister-in-law put two tests in my shaking hands.
“Are you going to watch?” I asked.
She rolled her eyes. “I’m not interested in seeing your vulva, but I do want to know the results of the test. If I leave you in here, you’ll dawdle, and then Logan will wake up, and I won’t be able to cuddle with you or jump up and down with glee. So get on with it.”
Once I peed on both sticks, it didn’t take long for two pink lines to appear. I wasn’t even surprised, not at this point. I sat on the closed toilet, pressing my fingers to my mouth.
“Shit.”
Rosa wrapped her arms around my shoulders. “Oh,mamacita…it’ll be okay. Just because you’re pregnant doesn’t mean you have to have a baby.”
“I know, I know, I know.” I leaned my head against her soft-from-four-babies stomach.
There was a soft knock on the door, then Ansel peeked inside. “What’s the news?”
“Knocked up,” I said.
He came in and kneeled in front of me, joining his wife in hugging me, careful of my breasts this time. “Ah, Smalls, we’ve got you, no matter what you decide to do.” He cuffed my chin. “Who’s the father?”
A tear leaked from my eye. Just one. That was all I’d be allowed…at least until later, when I could wallow in the privacy of my own bed.