“I went out by myself.”
“Oh.” She made a humming sound but didn’t ask me anything else. The implications behind me going out alone were pretty clear.
“What did you do last night?”
Her fingers sifted through my hair. “I did my thing after work, then I had dinner with June. You know, she quit working for her dad to nanny for Wren and Callum, but she might go back, even though that job made her miserable.”
“Sucks.”
“Yeah.”
“I thought you were out with your secret boyfriend.” I sounded so fucking stupid in the light of day.
She rolled closer to me, propping herself on her elbow. This meant I wasn’t getting my hair stroked anymore, but she smelled so good, I didn’t mind.
“Why would I keep a boyfriend a secret?”
“Don’t know.” I tucked my hands behind my head. “You’re always out. I feel like I’m missing a chunk of your life. Like you’re keeping part of you from me. I don’t like that.”
Her stare was steady…and I would have said unguarded had her eyes not darted to the side for a split second. She might not have been hiding a secret boyfriend, but something was going on that she wasn’t spilling. That made me real fuckin’ cranky.
“We can be friends without knowing every single aspect of each other’s lives,” she said.
“True. Very true. But I don’t like this feeling I’ve had about you since I came home from tour. It’s not that you’re not telling me everything. You don’t have to, I get that. I’m frustrated that it feels like there’s a piece of you I don’t know.”
She sighed, lids lowering. “Where’d you go last night, Adam?”
I stilled. Her lips curved into a smile that wasn’t really happy.
“I went out,” I answered. “I came home alone, drowned the rest of my evening in whiskey, and listened to Foo Fighters at full volume. It was pretty sad, if you want to know the truth.”
Her fingers slid through my hair, stopping to cup the top of my head. “But where’d yougo?”
I pinched the bridge of my nose. Should’ve known Baddie wouldn’t drop the topic.
“The club. I went to the club.”
I could’ve said I went there, drank more than I should have, knowing I wouldn’t be allowed to engage in any sexual activity, per the club’s two-drink maximum rule. That I didn’t do anything more than flirt, despite having a clear offer to do a hell of a lot more. That I came home lonelier than I’d been before I’d gone out.
I didn’t say any of it.
What I did or didn’t do at the club was separate from us. It wasn’t a secret relationship. It wasn’t important. It didn’t touch Baddie, nor did it take anything away from her.
She flopped back on her pillow, sighing. Silence rolled on. In the space between our breaths were all the words we weren’t saying. Secrets we weren’t telling. Truths we hadn’t yet realized.
“I think my dad has a secret girlfriend.”
“What?” Startled by her sudden change of subject, I rolled onto my side to study her. Her gaze was on the ceiling, one arm flung over her forehead, the other bunching the comforter. “Why do you think that?”
Her free hand flexed. “He has this watch my mother gave him when they were engaged. It’s really beautiful and classic, exactly my mom’s taste. He always wears it. Every day, he dresses in his custom suits and his gold Patek Philippe. Since she died, every time he’s started dating someone new, he wears a different watch.”
Her voice quavered at the end, and it made my stomach clench. I didn’t like Adelaide being sad. If Saul Goodman was making her sad because he couldn’t keep his shriveled, ugly, geriatric dick inside his pants, he deserved to rot in hell. In my mind, hell meant losing Adelaide. Hopefully it did for him too.
“So, he was wearing something different?” I coaxed as gently as I could.
Turning her head, her watery hazel eyes locked on mine. “He’s making a mockery of what he had with my mom. She’s been dead for ten years, and he’s been married three times.Three! I really hope there’s no afterlife where she can see what we’re doing with ourselves. It would break her heart. I know it breaks mine.”
“Baby…” Shoving my arm between her and the mattress, I curled it around and scooped her up, pulling her onto my chest. She scooted up until her face was nuzzled in my neck. Instead of holding the comforter, she balled my T-shirt in her fist.