He stilled, studying me so hard, it seemed like he was trying to see inside my mind. Then his head bobbed loosely when he got it.
“He talked?”
“Mmhmm. He told me what he sold you. I don’t know how you got away with doping for so long, but I think your moral high ground was actually a deck of cards, and it’s completely collapsed.”
He stared at me for a long time. Every second that passed, sadness seeped into my bones. Not just for Mads, but for Theo. For who I thought he was—who he could’ve been if he’d just wake up.
He nodded. “You’re right. Nothing you said was untrue. I’m not good enough for you. Not even close.” He climbed to his feet and held his hands out to help me stand. He was giving up, just like that.
Theo walked me the rest of the way up the steps to the door. There, he reeled me in to his body, his arms circling my shoulders, gently pressing me to his chest.
It took me a second to understand he was hugging me. It took another second for it to sink in how badly I’d needed this. I’d been embraced many times tonight, but when it came from Theo, my twisted insides unfurled, and I sank into him.
He held me until I let him go.
“I need to go to sleep.” I dug in my clutch, finding my key card. “I’ll see you in class.”
Theo’s fingers curled around my arm. “Two things before you go in.”
“Okay.”
“First, you’re so fucking beautiful, it’s hard to look at you right now. And you were magnificent tonight when you were talking about Madeline. If people didn’t love her before that, you made them fall.”
I had to bite on my bottom lip to stifle a sob. Theo touched my trembling chin, telling me without words that he noticed.
“Second is I know I’m not good enough, Helen. That doesn’t mean I’m walking away from you. It means I have work to do to get myself there. I won’t ask you to wait, but I’m telling you right now, you’re the only one I want to be with—and that won’t change.” He brought his hand up to the side of my neck, dipping his head to make sure I was with him. “It’s late. You’re tired. When you’re ready, I’ll tell you everything. About Amir, wrestling, steroids, my mom—all of it. Say the word, Tiger, and all my truth is yours.”
“I don’t know if I want your truth, Theo.”
I was sad right then, but when I had more energy and I wasn’t so raw from Mads, the anger would return. And man, was I pissed at Theo.
He closed his eyes, nodding as he exhaled. “Then I’ll have to work until you do.”
He swiped my key card for me, gently shoved me inside, and closed the door between us. Another nod, and Theo walked off into the night, and I went upstairs to my room, my heart aching and promises yet to be fulfilled.