Elena threw her arms out. “God, fine. I just came from helping Abby get ready for anarts fundraiser banquet. She borrowed a dress from me—Prada. When I wear it, I look smoking, but Abby doesn’t have enough ass to do it real justice, so you already know you look hotter than her.”
My nose scrunched. “There are going to be a lot of people at this thing. I don’t really care that she’s going to be there too.”
Elena hit her forehead, then widened her eyes. “You don’t get it. Abby spent the entire time I was with her going on about her little reunion with her ex. Theo is taking her tonight. Abby thinks they’re going to be official again ASAP.”
Now, that got my attention. It also made me feel like I was on the verge of throwing up seven hundred knives at once.
“We’re not together,” I rasped.
Elena nodded and grabbed both my hands. “I know. I get it times a thousand. But, babe, as someone who has spent a considerable amount of time with Abby, if Theo chooses to be with her instead of you, that says a shit ton more about his character than yours. Abby is decent, but she’s boring and like a walking cliché. She also has a tendency to whine, and the bitch is so literal, half my humor is lost on her, which cuts me to the quick.”
“If you’re nice to me, I might cry,” I whispered.
Elena’s eyes narrowed on me. “Your red lipstick makes you look like a whore. God, choose another color already.”
My insides untwisted. “That’s much better.”
She dropped my hands to reach around me and smack my ass. “Get out. I need to shave to prepare for some mediocre sex later.”
Zadie lifted a hand. “Thank you for the warning. I’ll go find my headphones now.” Then she gave me a quick hug. “You’ll be great. Just ignore them. You’re going for Madeline—no one else.”
Taking a deep breath, I nodded. This was for Madeline. Theo could take a long fucking hike in the desert without a drop of water, as far as I was concerned.
By the time I arrived at the event hall, my bravado had slipped. When I had been asked by the arts philanthropy chair of the Savage U alumni committee to speak tonight, I’d said yes immediately. That was months ago, when Madeline’s loss was fresh and I would have doneanythingfor her, including standing in front of a richie rich crowd and speak publicly.
What the fuck, past-Helen? We do not engage in public speaking. Much less when our ex...whatever he is...will be present and waiting for us to slip up. Girl, what were you thinking?
One foot in front of the other. That was all I could do. Luckily, I saw a familiar face at check-in. Miranda Wellstein was a well-kept brunette of an indeterminate age, though I was pretty sure she hovered somewhere around fifty. She was the kind of wealthy that could afford to be nice to everyone, and she was.
She came straight for me with a huge, white smile, enveloping me in a warm hug.
“Helen.” She pressed her cheek to mine. “Oh, honey, I’m so pleased to see you again.”
With my hands in hers, she stepped back and scanned me from my toes to my face. Her smile had grown tight when her eyes arrived on mine.
“I remember this dress.” She sniffled and batted at her cheek. “Madeline wore it when we sawLa Bohemein L.A. Oh, we had such a night, the two of us. We stayed over and had brunch celebrity style the following day. It was lovely, so very lovely. And you, Helen…look at you. She’d be so happy to see you in this dress.”
My throat went tight. All I could offer was a choked thank you. Miranda and Madeline had been good friends. During my time with Mads, she hadn’t allowed many visitors. She wouldn’t say it, but I knew it was down to pride. She didn’t want her friends and colleagues to see her near the end, when she was frail, with blue-tinged skin and next to no energy. Miranda had been one of the exceptions, but not for long, and not often. Toward the end, Mads would only talk to her by phone. I’d talked to Miranda almost daily, keeping her updated on her dear friend’s condition and spirits. We hadn’t grown close, but I guess we shared a bond since we both missed Mads something fierce.
Her hands slid to my shoulders, and she gave them a squeeze. “Now that I’m an emotional wreck, let's go inside. I’ll introduce you to a couple people and we’ll find our table. You’re sitting with me tonight, by the way.”
“Oh, thank god,” I breathed with relief.
Miranda laughed. “I would never invite you here, then abandon you.”
She hooked her arm through mine, then we strode into the banquet hall. There were dozens of smartly dressed people milling about, many with champagne or cocktails in hand. The men were in suits, the women in fine dresses. And I realized I fit, at least on the outside. If no one spoke to me, they’d never know I didn’t belong. But shit, I was going to have to get on stage and speak to all of them.
Miranda walked me around the room, introducing me to more than a couple people while never leaving my side, as promised. Once we’d made the rounds, she walked me toward a round table big enough to seat ten. A few people had already sat down. Miranda steered me to the two open seats between an older man and a younger one.
“Here, darling.” She rotated me toward the young man. “Let me introduce you to my stepson and his...friend. This is Theo Whitlock and Abby Fitzgerald.”
The world rocked under my feet, and I grabbed onto the back of the chair to steady myself. Theo rose with a practiced smile, one I’d never seen on him but recognized for what it was. In that moment, I was glad Elena had warned me Theo would be here tonight. Otherwise, I might have toppled over at the sight of him.
Theo Whitlock, in a finely tailored suit with a blue tie that matched his eyes, was a sight to behold. I would have never known he hadn’t grown up in this world because he wore it so well.
Miranda leaned around me, clutching Theo’s forearm. “Theo, this is Helen Ortega, my special guest.”
All of him froze, except for his eyes, which darted to mine in wide-eyed shock. I supposed I was the last person he expected to see tonight when he reunited with his girlfriend. A million thoughts raced around my skull, of what I could say, how I could act. I decided to go with the simplest course of action: the truth.