I watched as he left the parking lot, then turned toward the alley behind the school where the fencing bordered my street. I jumped the fence to my backyard. Taking the long way home like I had planned no longer interested me.
“Ton— Ugh. Étienne. Where were you last night?” Mom demanded, banging on my bedroom door.
My mom was thankfully in the shower when I got home, but of course my twin brothers had to make a deal about me not being home that morning. And when they did, I ran to my room and made sure my door was held shut. I didn’t think it a big deal. There were plenty of other teenagers who stayed over at their friends’ on summer nights without telling their parents. Plus, a seventeen-year-old is nearly an adult. Right?
“Hold on, Ma. I’m going to take a shower,” I said as I banged my side of the door.
“What did you just…? Get your ass out here now. You can take a shower later.”
You’ve got to be kidding me.
I threw on some clean clothes so my mom wouldn’t detect the smell of beer on my jeans. I then ran to the bathroom and gargled some mouthwash to mask my breath.
She was waiting for me in the rear living room. And before I even entered, she began with a lecture about responsibility and communication. And how even though I was practically an adult, I still needed to let her know what was going on.
“Get outta here!” she scolded my spying twin brothers. But only Niall visibly exited the room.
“Look. I trust you, Étienne. More than I trust any of them.” She gestured where Callum was obviously hiding with his walkie talkie. “But you need to tell me where you’re going. You can’t disappear like that.”
“Okay. All right,” I said, promising that I would let her know when I was going to be out.
“Étienne.” She leaned in closer to me and lowered her voice to hide the rest of the conversation from Callum. “I know you weren’t at Dana’s last night.”
“I’m going to kill Riley.” I flew out of the sofa and headed toward the sliding glass door that divided the rear living room and our yard. My sister was peacefully sunbathing on the back porch.
“Étienne. Stop. It’s not her fault.”
What do you mean it’s not her fault? Whose fault would it be? Who else saw me with Thad the other day and then bumped into me when Dana dropped me off last night? She could have kept her mouth shut. But she didn’t.
“Nobody needed to say anything, Étienne. A mom knows. I already knew. You’re hiding something from me, and I don’t like it.”
“Ma, I’m not hiding anything. Can I go now?”
“Don’t lie. I know you better than you know yourself. What’s going on with you this year? You used to tell me everything.”
“Nothing. I was hanging out with a friend. That’s it,” I tried reassuring her.
“Who? What’s his name?”
Now this was prying. “What do you meanhisname? Nobody, Ma. I have more friends than just Dana.”
She shook her head, looking down at my feet and changing her tone. “You don’t need to hide from me. You can tell me anything, honey.”
“It’s nothing.” I started to leave the room. “Going to take a shower.”
Okay, yes. It was something. I was hiding from my mom. But she always made a big deal whenever I did something new with my life. I’ll never forget what a fuss she made when I first started shaving my face. Or when I first started growing body hair, which I gladly got rid of thanks to being on the swim team. Or when I wanted to use my own money to purchase my own clothes after getting my first summer job after freshman year. It’s like she was obsessed with me. Always Étienne this, and Étienne that.“Étienne, can you watch the twins? Étienne, can you run some errands for me?”she’d ask me. Then,“Can you believe how great my son Étienne is?”she would say to people.
She could be somewhat smothering. I love my mom, and I wouldn’t change her for the world. I knew I was hiding something from her. Hiding the fact that I was changing. That I wanted new friends. That I liked someone, who probably didn’t like me the same way. I was finally ready to start building my own life. Was it too much to ask for some space?
MONDAY 09 JUNE 2008
9
ICE CREAM
“Oh my god. He fell asleep next to you?” Rhonda screeched, jumping with excitement.
I nodded, smiling after finally being able to tell someone about my weekend activities. Rhonda worked with me at the jewelry store, where I worked as an assistant. I only worked there a few days a week. It wasn’t much fun since Jason, the owner and general manager, always made little comments here and there, hinting at my masculinity, or lack thereof. But it paid better than any other part-time job a high school kid could have. On the plus side, I had Rhonda. She was in her twenties, though she acted like she was sixteen when she hung out with me during our shifts. She was genuinely interested in my life and asked about my friends and family, and even tried to invite me to her girls’ nights.