“There. Less uptight.” He smirked.
“Uptight? I’m not uptight. I like the way a structured, buttoned-up polo looks around my neck.” I grabbed my collar bone area.
“Um. Okay.” Trying to hold in a laugh, he signaled me to get in the car.
The drive there felt very much like our drive to Belle Isle. No music. No speaking. No sound. Just the two of us enjoying each other’s company, Thad yelling out “Ope” whenever he needed to swerve around a dreaded Michigan pothole. And as we ventured further into the northern suburbs, the houses began to look more and more alike. The lack of trees was unfortunate. In our area tall, old trees littered every street, towering over everything and giving everyone’s yard much-needed shade during the summer. And providing days’ worth of fun jumping into piles of leaves in the autumn.
The house party was an actual house party, which blew me away since the few photos I’d seen of my friends’ parties only looked like medium-size gatherings. His cousin lived in a big house out where newer subdivisions were being built. People lingered in every room on the first floor and in the basement. Every flat surface imaginable was covered in a pyramid of half-empty plastic cups and empty bottles and cans. The ceiling of nearly every room featured a built-in surround sound stereo system. You couldn’t hear yourself think.
I roamed the house with some sort of potent punch in my hand, then decided to sit on a small chair in the corner of the living room after losing Thad to his cousin. I sat there for a little while sipping on my drink, taking it all in. “People really do this kind of stuff?”I whispered to myself while watching a couple on the other side of the room make out, knocking over their drinks onto the rug. I couldn’t believe I was part of something like this. And even though I knew no one at the party except for Thad, I was happy that for once I wasn’t left out. For the first time, someone thought to include me in something fun, an experience no one should miss.
Where is he?After finishing my drink, I got up to go find him. I was feeling a little funny from the alcohol and started to worry how I’d get home if he left me there.
Hey. Still here?I messaged him, trying to step over a guy who clearly had too much to drink and was crawling on all fours, blocking the hallway between the living room and the kitchen.
I thought I saw him from the corner of my eye before nearing the kitchen but was interrupted by a tap on my shoulder. I turned, and a girl I’d never met before grabbed my left hand, then shoved a shot glass in my right. She encouraged me to down it in one gulp—which I did—then dragged me through the hallway to the small library at the back of the house. Well, it wasn’t as much a library as an office with a few bookcases. A few chairs and a sofa filled with older people I didn’t know lined the room. A makeshift bar sat on the computer table. This girl, who I’m certain was a couple years older than me, poured another two shots and demanded that I take one. I obliged. Why? I wasn’t sure. Would you have obliged?
After a second shot of what I remember being whisky, I squeezed myself into the corner of the couch with the others. The unnamed girl handed me a beer and lay across the laps of the people next to me, resting her head in my lap. This was new, and it was fun. But a sense of uncertainty cloaked my vision as I remembered that I needed to find Thad. He was my safe space in this strange house.
The girl grabbed my face, directing my gaze toward her, then winked.What is going on? I have to get out of here.My stomach began to churn, and I leaned back, trying to sink into the couch. She lifted herself up and tried to pull me closer to her, inching her face nearer to meet mine.
I CANNOT do this!Panic began to engulf my being.
“No. I need to get up.” I wormed myself up and over the armrest, falling to the side of the couch and spilling beer all over my legs. I jumped up and took a chug of the remaining foamy liquid, then set the bottle on the floor and left the room.
The ceiling started to drop in on me and people around me were spinning. I’d consumed too much alcohol. “Need some air,” I whispered, then beelined to the kitchen and nearly fell through the back door. I stopped for a minute on the back patio, trying to hold in the burning, sickening feeling in my stomach. I took a deep breath to try to push down whatever was coming up and headed over to the tree in the back corner of the yard.
I threw myself to the ground on the side of the tree that faced the bushes to the back of the yard so no one could see me and propped myself up against the trunk. I couldn’t lie down and let my blurred vision take control. I couldn’t move another muscle without triggering a reaction from my flaming insides. “This is not fun. I’m never drinking like this again,” I mumbled.
My phone hadn’t vibrated since I last texted Thad, so I closed my eyes and took deep breaths to alleviate my motionless motion sickness. I unintentionally fell asleep for a while. At least that’s what I think happened.
Two strong hands cupped my shoulders. “Étienne. Hey. You okay?”
Oh good. You didn’t leave me.
SUNDAY 08 JUNE 2008
8
MORNING AFTER
“Come on. Let’s get you some water,” he said into my ear.
Thad helped me up from the base of the tree and pulled my arm over him. It was still dark out, which meant I hadn’t been asleep for too long. And people were still inside drinking, though many had left. Thad brought me into the kitchen where I leaned up against the island to keep my balance while inhaling a glass of water.
“Thank you,” I coughed after accidentally breathing in some water. “Are we leaving?”
“Leaving? You’re in no shape to be riding over Michigan potholes. And I drank a lot.” He pointed to the beer he was still sipping, then gave me a wink.
What happened?I wondered.Why did he wink at me? Was that a flirtatious wink? Or was he also drunk and joking around?
He refilled my glass of water as I was feeling through my pockets to make sure I didn’t drop anything anywhere. The headphones attached to my iPod were tangled, so I pulled them out and put them on the countertop to try to unknot them.
“You brought your iPod?” He raised his eyebrow.
“I, uhm…”
“Hey, I have an idea.” He grabbed my arm and wrapped it over his shoulder.