Everything rushed back, and I could no longer control the memories or the fear that came with it.
“Tell me, Tatum,” he urged while his palm caressed my skin once more. “Tell me what you feel when you think about my brother.”
“I hate him,” I bit out between clenched teeth. “I hate him.”
“Why?”
“Because he hurt me.”
“I hurt you, too.”
“That was different.”
“How? How was it different?”
I turned my head in the direction of his voice, the blindfold casting my world in utter darkness. “Because even though you hurt me, I could see in your eyes that it wasn’t out of hate.”
“Then why? Why do you think I hurt you?”
I licked my lips. “Lust, hunger. The same reason I wanted to be hurt by you. Why Iwantto be hurt by you.”
Silence settled around us. I tried to listen for any noise, any shuffling of feet. But nothing. It was a heavy silence. Palpable. Then the sound of the belt striking my flesh sliced through the silence. I cringed and squirmed, trying to get rid of the burn that intensified with every lash.
“Do you see his face? Can you see the bloodlust marring his features? I do. I see it. I see it every fucking night when I close my eyes, the way his eyes beamed with pleasure while he hurt you. It haunts me, you know? It haunts me every fucking day for allowing him to do that to you.”
Another strike, and Vico’s evil face became clear inside my mind. The longer I focused on his face, the less I felt the pain. The longer I kept his dark, evil eyes in the center of my thoughts, the more my hate for him intensified. It started to boil, searing my veins from the inside. The hate, the resentment, the need for revenge.
“I don’t blame you,” I murmured.
“You should. If I didn’t have you kidnapped, if I didn’t fall for my mother and brother’s lies, you would be out there in the world living your happy life.”
“But I am.”
“What do you mean?”
I swallowed hard, my throat dry. “I am living my life…with you.”
“But you have lost so much because of me.”
“That might be true, but I’ve found more than I ever thought possible because of you.” My mind shifted from Vico’s face to the two pink lines that changed everything. And then it occurred to me, what would Vico do if he had to find out I was carrying Fattore blood inside me? If he hated me so much, what would he feel toward a child who was a result of me and Castello being together?
I startled when Castello started to untie my hands. What was he doing? I knew he wasn’t done yet. He was trying to do the same thing as he did with Ricardo. He wanted me to tap into every bad feeling I’d experienced since all of this started. Castello was trying to make me strong by letting me grab hold of the hate that would guarantee my survival.
When my hands were free, I instinctively wrapped them around my stomach. I was still chained, my face buried in the mattress.
“Why are you stopping?” I murmured. “I know you’re not done.”
He pulled the blindfold off, and I squinted as my sight got used to seeing light again.
Our gazes met. “You’re right. I’m not done, and neither are you.”
My gaze followed him as he walked to the front of the bed, kneeling down so he could look me in the eye. “Too many lies have surrounded you, Tatum. Lies destroyed us both, but I swear to God I will make it right. But I need you to hold on to the hate you feel for my brother. It’s the only way I’ll be able to make this right for you.”
His dark eyes softened, and I looked straight at the elongated pupil, the uniqueness of his soul shining through it. I no longer saw the scar on his face. All I saw was a man I had fallen deeply in love with. A man who seemed more determined than ever to make me his, to make sure I was strong enough so that nothing would ever come between us. But as he had said so many times before, he knew what I needed…and now I knew too.
I narrowed my eyes. “You’re going to kill him.”
He shook his head. “No. But you are.”