“Do you ever miss them?” Robin stroked a finger across his chest.
“Do you really want to know?”
“We can’t talk about our time together. Why not share your past with me? What will it hurt?”
“It’s not a good past.”
“Most life stories aren’t easy. I can handle it if you’re worried I can’t.”
“I’m not worried about that.” He reached a finger down to the base of her back and he watched as she tensed up. “You’ve seen it?”
“I don’t know what it means, but yeah, I’ve seen it. I know it exists. Does it bother you?”
“Truth?”
“Yeah.”
“It does bother me, more than you could know, but that’s because I know what it means.”
“Does it bother you that you’re having feelings for me? I know my dad’s close with you.”
“No, it doesn’t.”
“I keep digressing. Tell me about your parents. Your life. What brought you to here and to be the president of the Twisted Monsters MC?” She rested her chin on her hands, and he stared into her eyes, captured by her beauty. In the two years they’d been apart, she’d matured in ways he didn’t think were possible. Staring at her now, she was a sight to behold. A rare kind of beauty.
He never spoke about his past with anyone. His past was his darkness, his pain, and no one would ever be able to share it with him, but he didn’t want to keep anything from her.
“My mom and dad weren’t good for each other. They were drunks, both of them. They liked to party and do their own thing. Having a kid was never high on their list of things to have and if it was, well, they should’ve found another hobby. From a young age, I was neglected. I believe I was left in random places, you know? Hoping someone would take me and keep me. It never happened. My father liked to use me to get people to feel sorry for him. They’d give him money and he’d spend it on drink or drugs. My mom would spend all her spare time sleeping around, trying to get her next hit.”
“Wow,” she said.
“The beatings started to happen when I was four. I wasn’t earning either of them enough, and so I was an extra mouth to feed. I kept getting beat up for as long as I can remember. I grew, though. I came to realize, people can beat on kids all they want but they fail to see that kids grow up. We get stronger, and when we finally reach maturity, we like to hit back.”
“Did you start hitting back?”
“Yes, and when I did, I didn’t stop. I kept on hitting. I made sure both of them paid for the life they’d given me. They had made me strong. Turned me into the man I am today. I guess I blame them for all my mistakes. Even when I think about Bishop, I fucked up with him. I wasn’t there enough.”
“Thank you for telling me. I don’t imagine it’s easy to relive those kinds of memories.”
“It’s not easy at all. I don’t like to remember. It’s easier for me to forget. It’s what I like to do, forget.”
“I wish I’d been there. To take the pain away.”
He laughed. “You weren’t even a thought then. After I killed my parents, I left, jumping from town to town until I fell into the Twisted Monsters. From here, I took over, killed the guy in charge because I knew I could do a better job of it, and believe me when I say I did. This is all mine. I built everything around you.” There was no point to go into further details. She didn’t need to know the years of sexual, physical, and emotional abuse, or how he’d tried to end his own life when he was younger. There were some areas of his soul he never wanted to see again.
“How did I end up married to Bishop?”
“I’m not going to tell you those details. When you remember, you’ll be ready to know the truth.”
“That’s so not fair.”
“It’s the best you’re going to get.” He lifted up, smacked her on the ass, and climbed out of bed. “I’m going to feed you again.”
“You are?”
“Yes. As much as I want to laze in bed without eating, it’s not going to happen.” He leaned down and bit her ass. She let out a squeal. “Come on, let’s get you fed. I want you to keep your strength up.”
****
The next couple of days went by on cloud nine for Robin. She didn’t want her happiness to end, not even for a moment.
Not only were her feelings for Preacher growing, but she felt at peace. Even if her memories didn’t return, she had this. Bear wasn’t happy with her moving back in with Preacher, a decision she’d made quite quickly. He believed she was moving too fast, and in a way, she probably was, but she was chasing this feeling and wouldn’t let it go again, not ever. Whenever she was with Preacher, she actually felt something, something real, and happy.