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Dahlia Aldridge
They say there are moments in your life where everything changes and you are forced to view things through a new lens… I was having one of those moments. My perspective had slowly been shifting over the past few days, but this had been the final straw. The moment where what I’d previously thought was important became obsolete.
Eating disorder.
I’d said it out loud, confronting the elephant in the room. I could feel the boys staring at me, but I kept my gaze on the doctor, not knowing what came next. I could see the man, Dr. Sanderson, according to his badge, was surprised at my words as he came over and checked my pulse, comparing it to something on the machines without a word. My eyes flitted to Yates, who was staring at me with an expression I didn’t fully understand.
“You woke sooner than I expected,” the doctor said, sounding pleased. “You shouldn’t be feeling any pain from your ribs or leg, but if you need more medicine—”
“I am totally good,” I promised. I really was—I couldn’t feel anything at all.
“Well not exactly.” The doctor sighed. “Are you getting treatment for your eating disorder?”
“No. Not formal treatment.”
He nodded. “I am going to send some literature home with you regarding facilities and a few other elements like that, but the main thing I need you to consider is this—not eating, not providing your body with the right nutrition and vitamins, can negatively impact your health. It may seem obvious, but you need to start thinking about that and how it could affect your life in the long run.”
I nodded, knowing he was right, because the truth of the matter was that while I craved control, Ineededthe happiness of those around me and the future that I’d been pining after for years. I wasn’t going to let myself be the reason that I didn’t end up getting it.
I would change my behavior.
“The paperwork would be nice,” I agreed, not commenting any further. I knew it was a good idea to see someone. Did I think I needed a rehab facility or anything like that? No. Partly because if I was going to do something like that, I would much prefer to have someone come to our home and privately discuss what I needed to focus on to become better. Not only would that be better for me logistically, considering I didn’t want to be separated from my boys or family, but it would allow me to work through the emotional issues in the long term much better than I’d be able to if staying at a facility for only a month or so.
Honestly, the idea of having someone to check on my health, my vitamin levels and water intake? Someone to help me prepare meals that I was okay with for the week and to make sure my family ate healthy? I could deal with that. I think I was starting to come to terms with this far more than I assumed before, and oddly enough, the boys being here didn’t bother me. It was exhausting keeping secrets, especially from the men you love. I didn’t want there to be anything between us anymore. I refused for there to be anything between us.
Dr. Sanderson nodded, moving to the next topic. “I am going to send your prescriptions to the pharmacy. I was informed you are currently on pain medicine as well as antibiotics? Any other medications?”
“I haven’t been taking the pain medicine as much as I should, but I have been taking the antibiotic daily. I’m also on birth control.”
“Okay,” he said, jotting a note on his pad. “I won’t prescribe you the antibiotic for now, so finish out your current seven days and then we will go from there. Before we move further, is there any possibility that you could be pregnant?”
I blinked, my cheeks flushing. “Um, no. I mean—” Why was I so awkward about this? I had literally slept with all of these men. “When I was first injured, I was asleep for almost two days… So I missed two then, and a third one because of the time change while traveling, but I went back to taking them normally on Monday, so probably not.”
Dr. Sanderson looked up at me and frowned. “And you’re sexually active?”
“That’s none of your—”
I cut off Dermot’s harsh, angry words with a sharp look. He swore under his breath and went back to glaring at the doctor.
“Yes.” I nodded. “I am.”
“And when was your last period?”
“Maybe seven weeks ago? I have always had a super irregular period, though—it’s why I went on the pill to begin with.”
Dr. Sanderson examined my expression and nodded. “Well, just to be safe, I will prescribe pain medicine that is safe for use while pregnant.”
I blinked at him, the room seeming to have the air sucked out of it all at once.
What the heck had he said?
“You don’t think that’s actually possible, do you?” I asked softly, not meeting any of my guys’ gazes.
“It’s possible.” Dr. Sanderson offered me a small, sympathetic look, clearly seeing I was caught off guard. “Just because your period is irregular doesn’t mean that would translate to you having less of a chance of getting pregnant. Only three days missed makes it somewhat unlikely, but still a possibility. If you are, it would be very early on, most likely undetectable, but something to keep an eye on.”
My ears went static, not really hearing the rest of what he said because… I just didn’t know how to fully comprehend what he was saying. Pregnant. I could be legitimately pregnant.