“I lead,” I told her. “It’s who I am. I make decisions every day. Everything I do is driven by logic. But none of my training has prepared me properly for…” For you, I wanted to say but wisely chose not to.
I blew out a breath, released my neck, and dropped my head into my hands. I was totally fucking this up. And I hated that I had no idea what to say.
“Talking isn’t my strength,” I admitted. “Neither is giving up control.”
This seemed ridiculous. Fretting over the bullshit would get us nowhere. So I’d just be blunt. She might not like it, but it would be better than dancing around these asinine thoughts.
“I’ve never agreed with the Midnight Fae mentality associated with mating,” I told her. “But I never really cared too much because I never intended to take a mate. I’m independent and I do my own thing. However, you changed that, and now I’ve bitten you twice without your permission. Which is technically fine by our societal laws, but that doesn’t mean I feel right about it.”
My logical side argued that it wasn’t convenient at all, more of a burden. Especially considering the consequences of that action.
But that was all beside the point.
“Anyway, you chose Kols with your earth magic. You even chose Shade by biting him. Yet I essentially forced myself on you. Yeah, it was for the right reasons in the end, but that doesn’t change the circumstances for biting you.”
Okay. I was done rambling now. It left me feeling vulnerable and weak, two adjectives that were very much not me. And I sort of hated that Aflora drew that side out of me.
Avoiding relationships had worked well for me.
Maybe I’d go back to that.
Leave Kols and Shade to handle Aflora, protect them all from afar, and just—
“Zeph,” Aflora said, her hand curling around my wrist to tug my hand away from my face. “Look at me.”
I was tempted to glare at her in response but chose not to make this worse and gave her my attention instead. She studied my expre
ssion, her lips curling at whatever she saw there. Probably a scowl because this was fucking uncomfortable.
“I think that’s the most emotion you’ve ever displayed in my presence.” She sounded amused, which only made me want to glower again. But she distracted me with her tits as she sat up, her sweater stretching deliciously across her chest.
Removing her cloak had been a fantastic idea.
Actually, no. I should have just taken everything off.
“You made me mouseberries?” she asked, gaping at the plates on the nightstand.
“Don’t get too excited,” I cautioned her. “Pretty sure they’re just mustard berries or something.”
She snorted. “You know what they’re called.”
“Do I?” I asked innocently. “Huh. Well, I guess you’ll have to taste them and find out if I did it right.” I knew I had, as they were pretty much the same thing as sour green grapes, but I enjoyed teasing her anyway.
She flashed me an amused smile that made my heart race. Aflora was a gorgeous woman, but when she smiled at me like that, I forgot how to think.
Because I’d made her happy.
A rarity, it seemed. But for a brief moment, I’d pleased her, and that made me want to puff up in pride.
Kols would laugh hysterically at the sight. Fortunately, he wasn’t here to witness it.
Aflora took the plate, settled it into her lap, and propped her back up against the headboard. “All right, Headmaster. Let’s see if your chef skills measure up, shall we?” She waggled her brows at me playfully, then lifted the loaf to her mouth and took a sensual bite.
Well, it was sensual to me, anyway. Hell, everything she did with her lips and tongue seemed to hypnotize me.
And that moan she released after tasting the food I’d prepared?
Yeah, that was hot, too.