“Pardon?” I asked.
“The tingles. I can’t feel them.”
“It may only be temporary,” I told him.
“I hope so,” he said as he continued toward the house.
Walking inside, Mitchell was standing in the foyer with a towel around his waist and Ryden in his arms while he gave him his pacifier, rocking Ryden in his arms.
“I didn’t know how much formula,” he said, but Ryden seemed fine as he sucked on his pacifier. He handed him to Reika, who took him.
“I will be up in a minute,” she said to Ace, who started climbing the stairs toward Lucy’s old room. Reika walked toward the kitchen.
“I should go,” Mitchell said, and I shook my head.
“You can stay if you want,” I told him, and he nodded, looking down at the towel around his waist.
“I will just duck home and grab some clothes,” he said, and I nodded.
“I will come back soon,” he said, walking toward the front door.
I walked upstairs to Lucy’s bedroom, pushing the door open. I found Ace lying beside Lucy on her bed. The entire room had been transformed back to the way it was. Reika had even managed to reprint all of Lucy’s photos that hung on the walls and replaced them. Ace had tucked her purple comforter under her chin, his head propped on his hand as he watched her, and brushed her hair from her face.
“This is all my fault,” he said, and I shook my head.
“No, Tyson, it isn’t. This all started because I was with Melana. And when Lucy wakes up, she will realize that and want nothing to do with me.”
“It’s not your fault, Ace. Lucy will see that.”
“Will you stop it? Stop covering for me, Tyson. You don’t have to fix this. I know what I have done. If Lucy wakes up and doesn’t want me, you let her walk away. I won’t cause any more damage to her,” Ace said, sitting up.
“That won’t happen, Ace. Lucy loves you. Loves both of us. You can’t just walk away from the mate bond.”
“What mate bond, Tyson? She won’t feel it. And I won’t have you making her feel bad if she doesn’t want me anymore.”
“You are being ridiculous. This changes nothing. You don’t get to walk away. If you loved her, you would fight for her.”
“No. It is because I love her that I would let her go. Let her be free of me. Let her be happy, with you. Everyone is right, Tyson. You are the good twin. You did everything right from the start. I don’t deserve her. And Lucy deserves better than me, and that is you,” Ace said before walking out of the room.
“Where are you going?” I called after him, yet he didn’t answer. Instead, he ran down the steps, leaving the house.
Chapter fifty-one
Lucy
My head was pounding when I woke up. I wished I didn’t wake up at all, the numbness wore away, leaving fear and humiliation. The moment I did, everything smashed into me like a ton of bricks, threatening to suffocate me, restricting my ability to breathe. I was never going to escape him. Even now, when he couldn’t get to me, he still haunted me, still lingered at the edge of my mind. Opening my eyes, I found myself lying beside my mother, who was asleep beside me on a bed that resembled my old one. It even had the same matching comforter I had before my room was destroyed. I sat up on one elbow, looked around, and realized I was in my old room. Everything was back to the way it was before I left for school in Avalon City.
It was like I’d stepped back in time before everything went to shit, a glimpse into my old life, to the person I once was. Now, though, I saw my old life differently. I found the darkest parts of it looming over me, and I realized how naive and young I truly was nearly a year ago. Pictures of me having fun with Mitchell when we went to the beach and bowling hung on the walls. Mom had blown those up and framed them. Photos of Rayan and me. Some of Ace and Tyson, it all seemed like a lifetime ago as I spotted each one on the walls.
It’s funny how it only takes one thing to ruin your essence. One thing to burn the light out of your soul and dim the spark of life within you. Spending my early childhood in the facility was tough, horrific, and a brutal place to grow up in. But once I was freed, I thought that would be the end of my suffering. I had hopes and plans and was excited about my future and getting to experience the world to its fullest. The pictures held hope while I now felt nothing but hopeless and exposed.
Growing up in that place meant solitude, loneliness, and hopelessness. Stepping out was experiencing everything for the first time. The way fresh air smelled, how the breeze felt on my skin, and the feel of the earth under my bare feet was all new to me. And I was ecstatic at my newfound freedom. Sure that place sometimes haunted me still, the memories forever ingrained in my head. Yet I could disassociate them from the life I had now, separate them from me, and allow myself to feel safe for once.
But Mr. Tanner ruined that sense of safety. It took years of counseling and occupational therapy during the first few years of my freedom. Even just learning to adjust. That place made me institutionalized, and I struggled without the constant routine. Always looking over my shoulder and on edge, waiting for the doctors to come in and poke and prod us. Then everything went down the drain again, all that time gone, and I was finally free and happy within myself, and I felt safe.
Only to have the blindfold ripped off and be shown that even out here, monsters still existed. Showed me that they were lurking in the shadows, only now I was older and the horrors more real because I knew how dangerous they were. I was at the age when I should have been able to understand and pick up the signs of what a monster looked like. How could I be wrong and blind to it when I was raised in a facility full of them torturing us?
You would think I would be able to recognize them instantly. Yet no one tells you the biggest monsters are those we put our trust in. Those we blindly trust because they have sworn to protect and teach us. Now looking back, the signs were there. I just missed them. But now, they were startlingly clear. And I feared I would never be able to go back to the comfortable bliss I lived in before he tried to destroy me.