"Why not?" she said, and I laughed in disbelief. "Deira, listen to me! I'm not joking. I've actually thought about this a lot. The cost of living is cheap, especially during the winter. And Aunt Margaret loves you, so I'm sure she'd give you a discount. I've been looking at jobs, and I think there's a couple you'd be perfect for. Or, if you wanted, you could get a part-time job and finally have some time to work on your blog!"
"But," I started, and then my objections died on my lips. It was a crazy idea, definitely. But was it a bad idea?
"You were just telling me the other night that your life has been turned upside down lately," Dani continued in what I knew was her most persuasive tone. "Instead of trying to put it back together, what if you used this as an opportunity to start fresh?"
A fresh opportunity... It was very tempting. Dani was right. My whole life had fallen apart lately, and the idea of putting it back together was exhausting. The past few days had me thinking about how my life could be different. I knew this town would be a slower pace of life, and I couldn't discount how important it was to me to keep Dani in my life.
A voice in the back of my mind whispered,what about Cassius?But all I could think about when I thought about him was that day in the car, when I risked telling him what had happened with Mr. White, and he had doubted me. Before this past week, I had started to think that maybe Cassius wanted us to be a family, and I was feeling like we could depend on him. Between losing Makayla at the park and doubting my story about Mr. White, I just didn't think he could be there for us like we needed. Even if he wanted to, he just wasn't ready for a family. He didn't have his priorities straight. It was just me and Makayla, like it had always been. Why couldn't we move somewhere new? Why couldn't we start over? Maybe that was just what we needed.
Dani sat quietly watching me think things over, and then she nudged me gently.
"How about this?" she asked. "I'm planning to go visit her next weekend. Why don't you come along and see for yourself how great the town is? A little beach holiday that maybe turns into a brand new life for you guys!" She gave me a long, winsome look and a charming smile. I looked into her hopeful face and finally nodded. She squealed and hugged me, and I couldn't help but feel hopeful about the future for the first time in a while.
TWENTY-SIX
CASSIUS
Though my mother was doing well, I still spent the next week or so in the hospital. Now that I'd reconciled with my parents, I wanted them to know that I was there for them. But also, I knew that once I returned to my real life, I would need to talk to Deira, and I wasn't ready. Not because I wasn't sure what to say—in fact, the opposite. I knew that I wanted Makayla and Deira to be part of my life now, and forever. But we'd had such a rocky path, I was a little scared of how Deira would respond to me.
So, I put it off for days, until my mom finally prodded me to leave the hospital.
"You've been here forever," she said. "Go home, get a shower, and get a good night's sleep. And then, once you're refreshed, maybe talk to your girlfriend about us meeting our granddaughter." She winked at me.
"She's not my girlfriend, Mom," I protested, feeling like a teenager.
"But you like her, right?" my mother asked, and all I could do was grin in response. "See," she continued. "You have to go tell her. And it won't get any easier just because you keep putting it off." She was right. So, I followed her advice, and went home to shower and sleep. The next morning, I texted Deira, but she didn't respond. Impatient, I went into the office and looked in on her department.
"Deira?" her manager said. "She hasn't been to work in days. Took a last-minute vacation, I think."
A vacation? Surely, she wouldn't leave town without telling me. Anxious, I went over to her place. I knocked on the door but got no response. After a few tries, I left the building feeling dejected. There were kids playing in the front yard and I stopped to ask them if they had seen Makayla lately. They all shook their heads, and a small girl who looked about Makayla's age said, "They're staying with her aunt."
Of course! Why hadn't I thought to check Dani's place? That was Deira's refuge. I still had her address from meeting Deira there before, so I rushed over, getting more and more impatient. I told myself to keep my cool, but now that I had realized how important Makayla and Deira were to me, every moment I spent wondering where they were made me feel a little more desperate.
I reached Dani's apartment and tried ringing the doorbell. There was no response here, either. I leaned against the wall, frustrated as all hell. Maybe I could meet Deira when she went to pick up Makayla at school? But I checked the time and realized it was well past time for school to be out. Whether it was here or back at their own apartment, they should have been home by now.
As I was rubbing my temples and trying to think of where else they might be, a teenager came out of the apartment across the hall. I straightened up and waved to get their attention.
"Excuse me, do you know Dani, who lives in this apartment?" I asked.
"Yeah, sure," the teenager replied.
"Have you seen her lately? Or have any idea when she'll be home?"
"Oh, I don't think she'll be back in a while," the teenager said. "They left earlier today, and they had a bunch of luggage with them.
"They?" I asked, a sudden suspicion striking fear into my heart.
"Yeah, her and the other lady and the little girl. They left a few hours ago, and they each had like, three bags. I guess they were going on a trip." The teenager shrugged. "The little girl kept pretending to be an airplane."
"The other woman and the little girl, were they blond?" I asked. The teenager looked at me a little suspiciously, but answered the question.
"Yeah. I think they're friends or something. Anyway, I gotta go now..." she trailed off, starting to back away.
"Wait, just one more question," I said, desperate for information. "When did they leave, exactly?"
The teenager shrugged again, and then pulled out her phone to check the time.
"About an hour ago? I wasn't really paying attention, but it's been a while." Seeing my distress, she paused and said, "Sorry."