"What do you want to do first?" I asked once we were inside the park.
"I get to pick?!" Makayla asked. I nodded, and she squealed excitedly. We went over to look at the map near the entrance, and she picked the carousel. I helped her up onto a white horse with a gold mane, and she insisted I ride the purple horse beside it. After the ride was over, she asked if we could go again. This time we switched horses.
After the carousel, we went on the spinning teacups ride, also twice. Then we went on the bumper cars three times. She really loved crashing into me with her car. I made sure not to go too fast, so she could catch me, and whenever she did, she'd run into me full speed and then laugh really hard.
For lunch, I got us hotdogs with funnel cakes for dessert. After lunch, we tried a few calmer rides, like the train that circled the whole park. During the train ride, she chatted my ear off, pointing at different things and talking about them. She asked a lot of questions, and I did my best to answer them. She seemed really smart, and I couldn't help but feel proud as I listened to her. Next, we went on miniature gondolas that bobbed along a tiny, manmade river. She had gotten a little quieter, and kind of leaned against me, so I thought she must be tired. After the gondolas, we went to the arcade section of the park and played games for the rest of our time there. When she asked how many game tokens we could buy and I told her as many as she wanted, her eyes lit up.
"I wantone hundred," she said, and when I put money into the machine and entered 100, her eyes got big as saucers. I handed her the cup full of tokens and she whispered, "I didn't think I could actually get one hundred." It was adorable, but it also pulled at my heartstrings. Getting that many tokens wasn't particularly expensive, but she acted as though she'd won the lottery.
"Do you ever play games with your mom?" I asked her casually as we were playing a driving game. She nodded.
"Look out, there's a cow in the road!" she screamed, laughing at the silly game. After a second, she seemed to return to my question. "There's a place like this near our apartment," she said. "But we only go once in a while, because we're on a budget." I hated hearing that, and I almost felt a little mad at Deira. Of course, it wasn't her fault if they didn't have much money. But why did she keep refusing my offers for help?
I didn't say anything more to Makayla and just told her that if she showed me where the arcade was, I would buy her 100 tokens for that place, too.
"Okay!" she said, grinning. "Thank you, Cassius!" Watching her face light up reminded me of when she'd hugged me in the car. It was such a small thing, and yet it made me feel warm inside.
After the park closed, we had a little time left before I said I'd have her home, so I asked if she wanted dinner. She immediately picked a fast-food place and told me she wanted the meal with the toy. I agreed, and then she suddenly looked pensive.
"Is that too expensive? Momma told me not to ask for anything too expensive."
I tightened my hands on the wheel.
"No, it's not too expensive. It's very cheap."
"Okay," she said. "Then can I have a milkshake?"
We got her the meal with the milkshake, and she ate it faster than I would have expected from such a tiny person. She fell asleep on the way home, so, when we got there, I texted Deira that I'd carry her up and gently picked her up from the back seat of the car. Deira met us at the door to the apartment building and directed me toward their place. I was mostly concentrating on not waking Makayla up, but I couldn't help but notice how shabby the space was.
I carried Makayla to her room, which was barely bigger than a closet. Deira was going to change her into pajamas, so while she did that, I looked around the apartment some more. It was a mess. Just from what I could see with my eyes, there were several problems that needed to be fixed, and I shuddered to think about what problems might be hidden in the walls. This was how they lived?
The more I looked around, the more my heart sank. Before, I'd mostly offered to help Deira because I felt I owed it to her. But seeing the conditions they were living in was like a punch to the gut. It made me sad, and I also felt a pang of guilt. After all, weren't things this way because I hadn't been around? I knew that wasn't my fault, but I couldn't help feeling responsible for it anyway. I sat down on the couch to wait for Deira to come out, determined that I would do something to assist them.
When she did come out, she seemed surprised that I was still there.
"You didn't have to wait," she said.
"I don't mind," I replied, standing. "Did you eat? Let's order something." She shook her head.
"I made pasta. Do you want some?" She pointed at the stove.
"Sure," I said. I wasn't really hungry, but the food gave me an excuse to stay. She made us up two plates, and we sat at the table in a comfortable silence.
"What do you want to talk about?" she suddenly said.
"Who said I wanted to talk to you about something?" I asked, surprised that she had figured this out. She just grinned at me.
"Let's just say, I think I'm starting to be able to read you pretty well."
"Well, since you brought it up, there are a few things... Your car, your house, and the things I buy for Makayla."
"The things you buy..." She paused, then looked at me. "You don't need to buy things for Makayla." I could beg to differ, given what Makayla had said about their budget, but I decided to go with a gentler approach.
"I want to," I said. "When she's with me, she can buy whatever she wants. I have the money, so please let me spoil her a little. And please let me cover anything she needs, for school, or at home."
"Cassius..." Deira's voice was a little tense. "I understand you want to help, and I appreciate it. But this is a bunch of big changes for us. I don't like the idea of you just sweeping in here like some Prince Charming. It's not realistic."
"It's very realistic to me," I said softly. "Also, you think I'm charming?" I raised an eyebrow, trying to break the tension a little. She blushed.