I’d be a harpy later. When I didn’t feel so guilty and could throw things at them again with a clear conscience. I nodded firmly and with determination I left the house.
It wasn’t until we were driving to school that I realised I hadn’t checked my phone since…Saturday? Matt called my name from the front seat to get my attention. I looked up and he handed me my phone.
“Needed charging,” he explained. I mumbled a thanks as I waited for it to turn on. “Colton spoke to your Papa on Sunday night,” he continued. My head came up so fast I may have given myself whiplash. I felt my mouth drop open.
Theo turned around in the seat to look at me. “We told them you had food poisoning, didn’t want them to worry. You’re to call your grandmother when you feel better.”
I just stared at them. Had they always been this controlling? Or had I always been that absent that I just hadn’t noticed? Maybe that’s why they were so controlling, they were used to just doing the stuff for me without me noticing.
What kind of person did that make me?I wondered as we parked at school. I still didn’t understand how they always found parking. I was beyond the point of caring now. I had enough to think about.
My phone had five text messages from Jay wondering if I was ok and not getting an answer from anyone.They could call my grandparents but couldn’t tell my friend I was ok?
I muttered as such to Theo as we walked across campus. Matt had trotted off to meet Colton who had headed in early to sit the test he had missed yesterday.
Theo slowed down to look at me in confusion. “What you thought we would go through your phone?”Well when you put it like that…
“Well Colton phoned my grandparents,” I protested weakly.
“He got the number from the front of your fridge.”
Oh.
He continued to stare at me. I felt kind of crappy. I thought they had been trying to control me again. Was it an honest mistake? Probably. Would they see it that way? Probably not.
I sighed. Theo handed me my tote. “I’ve got to run past the library before my first class.”
“Ok,” I didn’t meet his gaze. Only I could upset loveable Theo, out of all of them Theo was the most-easy going. He always had an easy smile and was the most relaxed out of all of them.
As he turned away, I reached out and grabbed his arm. He stalled and looked at me. “I’m sorry. It’s just all of this, it’s too much,” I tried to explain.
His frown didn’t make me feel better. “This is how it’s always been Ari. Nothing has changed for us,” I nodded. He was right, they had picked up exactly where our friendship had left off in Big Sky.
“Maybe I have?” I countered, he shrugged. “Maybe I changed too much,” I whispered as I fidgeted.
“Maybe you have but we’re your family, you can talk to us. Tell us what you need, and we’ll do it or at least try. Life dealt you a shitty hand Arielle, but I told you weeks ago. You won’t be alone again, family doesn’t give up on each other,” he smiled at me, kissed me swiftly on the cheek and then was off.
I sighed and tilted my head back as I groaned. Why couldn’t I be normal? I had fantastic friends who had done everything to make my life easier, who were willing to provide a home and clothes for me and wanted nothing but the best for me.
Why was I being so awkward about this? Was I really losing my independence if I moved in with them? Colton had been gone this morning, Connor never seemed to be there. Matt and Theo came and went as they pleased, I could do with the income from renting out the apartment. It would save me having to get a job but in reality, was that what was best for me?
I needed to speak to my grandparents. I didn’t trust myself to make the right decisions anymore. Saturday had pretty much confirmed I was reckless when it came to good choices. My initial lip locking session with Colton at my mother’s funeral – not one of my best moments either, and what was I actuallydoingwith Jay? Did I want a relationship with him? Was it fair to either of us, when at the drop of a hat I wrapped myself round Colton whenever I could?
I crossed over to the Denison building feeling out of sorts with myself. Which is why I was perfectly entitled to detour into Starbucks and get myself a Pumpkin Spice Latte.
I’d think about it later, I needed to concentrate on classes and just getting through today.
As I exited Starbucks, I spotted Robbie and quite frankly the largest guy I had ever seen in my life. He was massive, everywhere. He was a walking wall of muscle. Robbie wasn’t slight, but he looked like Stan Laurel beside this dude.
Robbie saw me and for the first time he genuinely looked unhappy to see me. I shrugged it off, wasn’t my fault really.Yes it is.If I could inner glare at myself I would – although I reckon if I started rolling my eyes backwards in my head Robbie would run to the first priest, he could find. I coughed out a giggle.
“Elle,” Robbie greeted. I smiled at him but my eyes were drawn to the walking tank beside him.
“Tommy, I guess?” It didn’t take a rocket scientist to figure this was the sporting roommate, if he didn’t play defence on the Buffs football team, I would eat my shoe.
He was even more imposing close up. He had to be about 6’5” in both height and width. He had buzzed blonde hair. His features were oddly delicate for the size of him, his bicep was possibly the width of my entire frame.
He grinned at me. “How you doing? You must be the heartbreaker?”