A crisply dressed waiter comes by. Faye decides on grilled halibut with basil and pine nut sauce and a sparkling pink lemonade. I ask for whatever the special is—I’m not in the mood to be finicky about lunch—and a dry Riesling. Something stronger would be better, but it really is too early for hard liquor.
Our drinks appear almost instantly after the waiter goes away. Faye sips her lemonade and looks at me through her lashes. “I was surprised to get your text. I thought we were going to spend some time together yesterday.”
That was the plan…until Ava. “Something came up.”
“Get cold feet?”
“What?”
“I saw you go to a jeweler on Wednesday when I was out shopping. I didn’t say anything, but…”
I scowl, but she’s correct. I went to get a ring, something large and flashy enough to suit her. But there’s no way I’m telling her that now. “I was shopping for a gift. For my mother.”
“Oh? You have a sudden attack of filial piety?” I haven’t told her much, but Faye is smart enough to read between the lines.
“Yeah, I know. But she’s still my mother.” Who I stopped buying anything for when I cut ties with her. This, Faye doesn’t know.
The arrival of our lunch interrupts our conversation. I push the angel hair pasta around, and Faye takes a small bite of her fish, then stops.
“What is it?” she asks.
I pause. I assumed this would be easy, but it’s not. Maybe if I didn’t like her, it would be simpler, but I do, and I don’t want to hurt her feelings.
“Lucas, you can tell me anything. You know I prefer straight shooters.”
I nod. “Okay. I wanted to let you know it’s not going to work out.”
“What isn’t?”
“What you said at the hotel. I don’t think we can marry or…pretend to have romantic feelings.”
She blinks a few times, then looks down at her fish. “What happened?”
“I’m just not interested in you that way anymore.”
“You mean I don’t turn you on anymore.”
Damn it. “Faye.”
“I’m not stupid, Lucas. I can tell when a guy wants me. You don’t.”
“It’s not you…”
“Then what? You’re way too young for physical issues.”
I run a hand across my lips. “No, it’s nothing like that. It’s just that…I can’t do it with anyone but Ava.”
Faye pulls back. “She left you.”
“She came back.”
An awkward “I knew it” smile crosses her face, then she shakes her head. “So it’s that simple, huh?”
“You’re still my friend, Faye. I’ll always be your friend, but sometimes friendship isn’t enough.”
“She’ll never love you the way I do.”
I grow quiet. Faye is right. Ava’s love is hard won and hard to keep. But it’s worth it because she doesn’t love easily, and when she does, it’s absolute. And now that I have it, I can’t give it up, not even for my friendship with Faye. “No, but I love her, Faye. I want to grow old with her, have family with her and give her the world.”