“Again? Wait, so you knew him before?”
“He’s the guy I had a crush on ten years ago. You know, the reason I stuck around in L.A. rather than going to Tuscany.”
“Oh.” Ming Ming nods.
She only knows it ended, but not how. I never told her because I was too busy trying to convince Grandma Shirley not to hurt Dominic, then spent some days in the hospital afterward. By the time I was discharged, I understood that I needed to follow Grandma’s cardinal rule—never do anything to make me or her look bad—if I wanted to protect Dominic.
“Anyway when I asked, he expressed interest in making a sizable donation to the foundation. We met once to discuss exactly how we plan to help poor kids who can’t afford to go to school. And I needed a date for this party, so I asked him.”
“I’m surprised Nate didn’t want to come.”
“Nate’s busy with the opening of his clinic. Also he’s probably tired of people jumping to ridiculous conclusions about the two of us.”
She rolls her eyes. “Oh, come on. I have high hopes for you guys. You can’t deny Nate’s a great catch. If I thought he was interested in me, I would totally do him. And have a prenup so we could never divorce.”
“The whole idea of a prenup is that you’re going to divorce.”
“But he’s perfect.”
“What if he snores or farts in his sleep?”
“Then we can have separate bedrooms. No biggie. He has other very good points.”
“Such as?”
She starts ticking them off with her free hand. “Handsome. Rich. Good-looking. Well-off. Attractive.”
“Those are just two things repeated in different words.”
“Well, I’m not sober. It’s hard to think. But there’s a third point…” Giggling, she leans closer and lowers her voice. “He’s hung like a horse.”
I almost spit my drink. “How do you know? Have you…?”
“Nope…but I can look.” She waggles her eyebrows. “And measure. I have very precise eyes.”
“You’re terrible.”
“I know. But that’s why you love me.”
I laugh. True, this is the reason why I love Ming Ming. She rarely takes anything seriously and laughs easily. I also envy her upbringing. Her parents are somewhat traditional and impose their beliefs on her from time to time, but they love her to pieces. She’s totally confident about her place in the world, about making her own destiny, knowing she has her entire family behind her.
“Tell you what,” she says. “I’m going to get you laid.”
I roll my eyes. “I’m not playing victim to your Cupid.”
“Victim?” She gasps. “You mean beneficiary. You gotta get your words right, or you’re going to hurt my feelings. Besides, it’s my birthday. I’m entitled to set you up.”
“Who’s the other unwitting victim? One of your cousins? A mainland actor?”
“No, no. Dominic. He’s too delicious to ignore, don’t you agree? It’ll be perfect: a down-memory-lane fuck.”
I shake my head. “You’re wasting your time and effort if you think you can make anything happen between the two of us.”
She gasps. “Them’s fighting words!”
“Them’s the truth.”
“I’m gonna make you eat ’em.”