Lights twinkle down at the city below. They illuminate downtown the same way they do every night. The same way they had the night I brought Rory up here after I found her wandering down a road like a lost puppy.
Unmindful of my presence, the people down there live their lives. None of them are burdened with the influence of my family’s name. The Kellet curse.
Ordinary. What’s that like?
The lack of air something I’m not unaccustomed to. Smothered under my father’s thumb my entire life, so what’s the difference now? The flatness of the wind at least can change its direction.
After the waste of a conference, sitting in my car listening to Silas drone on for the entirety of lunch. I skipped the rest of school and practice and have stayed here since.
His clinginess lately alarming even for me.
Silas Kellet did nothing without absolute purpose. If he isn’t benefiting from it, he’s not putting in the effort.
It’s too early for him to be involving me in the business this much. We despised one another, and so I thought I bought myself a few more years before this day arose. I assumed wrong.
I despise being misled, but for the moment, I have no other choice.
If I want answers, I will have to get him to trust me—that word in the vaguest of senses. Silas doesn’t trust anyone fully, not even Abram, his business partner.
To achieve this, I have to follow along. Be obedient. Gain my leverage slowly and with precision.
I can tell he’s already growing suspicious. I am his son, after all. I know how he works and I’m not stupid. He’s being too cautious, involving me some but not in anything that’s jarringly beneficial.
Bending my leg, I arch it, trying to avoid the tingly numbness that comes with staying in the same position too long. My butt already a lost cause.
The hood isn’t the most comfortable thing, but it does the job.
Besides, nothing can compare to the custom hand-stitched seats I have in the interior. They cost a small fortune but are worth every dime.
Tonight, I don’t want comfortable. I want the piercing bite of a chill. Something that paralyzes me to the bone.
Anything to wash away the moment of regret from her face in that closet. I didn’t have to see Rory to know as soon as it set in. I sensed it in the way her body stiffened. Freaking out before she started closing herself off.
Shutting down on me all over again.
I thought she’d been letting me back in. More metaphorically than literally, but that happened too. Again, I’d been incorrect in my assumptions.
That word settles like a bad taste in my mouth. It’s happening far too often these days.
I decided then, right before I stepped out on her, that this can’t happen again.
We mutually gave in, but next time, if I’m lucky enough to have another, it will be on her. I’m straining as is. I can’t take much more disappointment.
Not from her, at least.
I’ve been trying to make myself scarce out of respect for her, not myself. If I have it my way, I’ll force her hand as I’ve done in the past. I’m trying to give her what I think she thinksshewants, but it’s hard.
Silas and his selfish neediness have helped some, but the distance grows harder every day.
Rory may not realize it, but I need her. She’s my life.
My entire existence before she forced her way into my own had been dull and saturated. I hadn’t known that until it was too late. I lost her before I truly had her.
One day I hope to be Rory’s everything again, but right now, I’ll start with her trust.
Resting my arm on a propped-up knee, I twiddle the singular item between my fingers. The baton-looking thing was the same object Rory tried to shove straight through my chest out of her own anger.
I’d found this little keepsake on my comforter the day my mother had taken her own life.