“The best man, Ben.”
I couldn’t breathe. My throat seemed to close up, and my head spun. He was married? How was that possible?
Oh my God, I was theother woman. A homewrecker. I was such a fucking idiot.
I couldn’t bring myself to speak around the feeling of suffocating, so I wordlessly led the wife of the man I’d been sleeping with inside, pointing to the door where she could find him. I could tell that she thought my behavior was weird by her furrowed brow, but I just avoided her eyes and turned away. I felt too guilty to even look at her.
God, this hurts.
I continued on to the bridal suite, my steps fast as I heard Amy knock on the door behind me because I didn’t want to be out in the hallway if he answered the door for his wife.
Hiswife.I felt like I was going to be sick. Or maybe just have a meltdown.
But when I stepped inside the bridal suite and my eyes landed on Faith, I knew that neither of those reactions were an option. I had to pull myself together, because the last thing my best friend needed on her big day was to deal with a hysterical best friend with yet another stupid broken heart.
I swallowed hard around the lump in my throat as I crossed the room and handed Faith her water. I avoided her eyes too, knowing that she’d see the pain in my face if I wasn’t careful. Luckily, she was busy balancing on one foot while Sage helped her slip on her white heels. That distraction allowed me to hide my inner turmoil from her.
“Are you ready for your hair and makeup?” the hairdresser asked, appearing in front of me.
I blinked. Everything felt surreal right now, and I couldn’t believe how much my whole world had changed in the blink of an eye.
“Uh, yes. Sure.”
I sat in the chair and closed my eyes, letting the hairdresser get to work while the makeup artist sat in front of me and started applying foundation. At this point, I didn’t really care how I looked, and Iespeciallydidn’t give a damn if Ben liked my appearance. All I wanted was to get through the rest of the day without succumbing to the heartache that was threatening to consume me.
Hopefully, this makeup artist could work miracles and somehow hide my hurt, anger, and sadness.
* * *
Standing nextto Faith during the ceremony was torture. The couple wrote their own wedding vows, which were beautiful, full of love and devotion that seemed to punctuate my own misery.
It didn’t help that Ben was standing beside Michael, looking like the most handsome man I’d ever seen in his tuxedo. He really filled the thing out, and I felt like the universe was punishing me for some kind of horrible sin I’d committed in a past life or something equally unfair.
It was too painful to look at him, knowing that his charm and sweetness meant nothing. His words about wanting more than a hookup with me were even more meaningless. This hurt even more than the end of my relationship with Aiden, and I was barely holding it together.
Finally, the vows were said and the rings exchanged. The newly married couple sealed their promises with a kiss, and everyone stood up to clap. Suddenly, it was time to walk back up the aisle, just the way we’d practiced at the rehearsal last night.
That meant Faith and Michael were going to lead the way, followed by me and Ben. I hadn’t even been thinking about it, but now I had no choice but to endure being that close to him.
Our eyes met as we came together, and I could see the concern in his. He could tell that something was wrong with me, but he didn’t know what it was. Still, he offered me his elbow.
I ignored it. Gripping my bouquet with both hands, I just averted my gaze as I faced forward and we walked back up the aisle side-by-side. This wasn’t the time to tell him what I knew, not that I wanted to talk to him at all. I felt too foolish for allowing myself to fall for a married man. I didn’t need to rehash the whole thing with him.
I just needed to get through the reception, then I would be leaving for home tomorrow. I knew that Ben lived in New York City too, but it would be easy to avoid him in a huge city like that. It wouldn’t be like it was here on the island, where he was there every time I turned around, a sexy temptation that won me over even though I knew better the whole time.
I never saw this coming, the feelings I developedorthe ultimate betrayal. Now, I was returning to New York with a completely different heartache than the one I had when I left.
CHAPTER14
Ben
For Michael and Faith, today was the happiest day of their lives. I could practically see the love in the air between them, and it was easy to get caught up in it during the ceremony.
But when I looked over at Tatum, my own good mood diminished. I didn’t know what was wrong with her, but there was definitely something on her mind. She tried to hide it with a smile, but I could see how forced it was. It didn’t reach her eyes.
She seemed...deflated somehow, like the life had been sucked out of her or something. It was in the way she held herself, with her shoulders slightly angled in giving her the appearance of trying to shield herself from something.
She was fine this morning when we woke up in my bed together. In fact, she’d happily joined me in the shower and there was no better way to start the day, in my opinion. She had seemed excited about the wedding. About us, even.