The blood rushes from my face.
“Ahh.” He tilts his head back. “ You get it.”
“I-I’m sorry. I didn’t think—”
“No. You didn’t. It’s our job to stay one step ahead of our enemies. It’s how we survive. You’d fallen headfirst into a world you don’t understand. So, when we tell you to do something,” Grimm steps forward, and I lean back into Preacher, “you listen and obey. Do you understand?” His words are clipped, and the fire in his eyes terrifies me.
I nod, unable to speak.
“Good. Because I’m not risking my men over your stupidity.”
I flinch at his harsh words.
“Tell Tech all the information he needs so we can try to salvage this cluster fuck.”
I nod once more, chastised and shamed by my selfish, one-sided thinking. I recently gained the freedom to live life on my own terms. Lashing out against having everything I fought tooth and nail for wrecked was second nature.
“Preacher. Stay on her. When you’re done, come see me.”
“You got it, Pres.” Preacher looks at me with sad eyes. “Let’s go, love.”
I follow him numbly as he heads down the hall on the opposite side of the building. “I thought you understood this life.”
“How can I when everyone’s been playing cloak and dagger? You don’t explain the rules, yet you’re pissed when I break them? I’m not a child. I won’t do things just because you tell me to. I need more than that.” I throw a hand up.
“Trust is earned, not—”
“Do not treat me like one of your prospects, Edmund.”
His eyes widen.
“You’ve kept me in the dark, and I felt it.” I slam a hand over my heart. “There’s no separating us,” I gesture back and forth between us, “and the MC. It’s who you are.” My heart races. “Or was that all a ploy? Keep the outsider occupied, so she doesn’t ask questions?”
“That’s not what happened at all,” he growls.
“How can I believe that?” The air leaves me when he slams me against the wall, pinning me in place with his muscular frame.
“I feel this just as much as you do. I never wanted to do this again, Flower. But you’ve worn me down with that clever little tongue, blinding smile, and lush frame. I want to know you inside and out. Sinners have nothing to do with what’s between us.”
“Why?” I croak. “Why now?” Show me I’m wrong, Edmund.
“We’ve been dancing around each other for years, but you gave me the signal, and I heard you loud and clear. I could ignore my own wants, but not yours. I won’t see you wanting for anything.”
The sincerity in his eyes tightens something in my chest.
“I’m not asking you to put your faith in Sinners. I’m asking you to put it in me.” The words are a final blow in a boxing match.
I relax against him. “Don’t let me regret this, Edmund.”
“You won’t where it matters.”
I like the honest promise. I’ve been caught up in a riptide, and survival depends on reaching out for help. Relenting, I bury my face in his nape.
* * *
Exhausted and teary-eyed, I swipe at my burning eyes as I lean against the wall watching him back out of the trail I’d left.
“Did you catch it in time?” Grimm asks from over his shoulder.