We were family. We were strong together. I could find it in me to tell Rose I needed her. The true weakness had been in avoiding this moment.
“I was stupid,” I said. “I thought I could battle demons on my own, but it’s too much. Help me?”
Rose’s arms tightened around me. Her lips brushed my cheek. “Of course. Tell me everything, and we’ll get through this, just like we always do. I promise.”
Chapter Fourteen
Damon
Rose turned off the Buick’s engine in the amber glow of the lights on the side of the Hallowell garage. The manor loomed in the night like a mountain of thicker shadow until Meredith must have flicked on the front hall light at the sound of the car. A paler glow seeped from the windows.
We’d driven through evening and dusk right into night. Jin’s car was parked a few spots over, he and the twins standing by it waiting for us.
My consort turned to Gabriel, who’d ended up in the back seat after all. “Can you give us a moment? Tell the other guys a little more about the situation than we were able to say over the phone?” She’d been just as cautious in our communications that the Assembly might theoretically trace as in ensuring her dad wouldn’t use the incident against us.
Gabriel nodded and opened his door. Before he got out, he leaned forward to give my shoulder a quick squeeze. He didn’t say anything, but I already knew he was with me in this as much as Rose was. My throat tightened with the wish that I’d figured that out sooner.
When he’d shut the door behind him, Rose glanced at me. I resisted the urge to scratch at the gauze bandage she’d wrapped around my left forearm from wrist to elbow, across the entire length of the expanded mark. She’d drawn glyphs on the fabric with pen that she’d then imbued with magic. Her work hadn’t healed the scar; it’d only contained the violent energy that’d coursed from it. I could still feel the prickling burn around my bones.
Because of her efforts, I’d been able to stay in control the whole way home, but it was only a temporary solution.
This was the first time we’d had a chance to talk just the two of us. The questions I knew she must have been mulling over, the ones she’d held back until we could speak privately, hung in the air between us for a moment.
When she spoke, her voice was soft and steady. “Why didn’t you tell me sooner?”
Yeah. That was the big one. I wet my lips, struggling with the answer that was almost as hard to say as my request for help, even though I’d had plenty of time to think it over during the drive.
“You know I’ve had trouble sometimes feeling like I’m really part of the group—like I still fit with the rest of you. I thought I’d gotten past that, but… I don’t know. Some of those old insecurities started eating at me again.”
“The demons’ energy was probably stirring them up on purpose,” Rose said. “Looking for a foothold so they could work on you more easily.”
That made sense. Lord, how long had that influence been creeping through my mind, subtly altering my perceptions, before I’d even noticed anything odd emanating from the scar?
“I still should have realized,” I said. “I should have at least come to you. It was just— I don’t want to be yet another problem for you to solve. I want to be bringing good things into your life, not dragging you down. If I could have used the power the way I meant to—”
“Damon.” She reached over to take my hand, heedless of how close that brought her own to the malicious energy inside me. “You don’t need to be casting spells to make me happy. You just have to be here. I’ve never wished you were different, or doing more, or anything like that. I loveyou, not some idea of a person you could be.”
“I know.” That understanding was what drew the most knots into my stomach. “I haven’t been enough for many things in my life. I wasn’t enough for my dad to stick around. I wasn’t enough to make it through high school. I haven’t been enough to give my mom a better life in any significant way. I guess it’s hard to comprehend that I could be enough for you, even with four other guys picking up my slack.”
I raised my head and met her gaze, tightening my grip on her hand. “But I know you’ve always believed in me, even when I was being a jerk. I know you’ve always had my back. The supernatural stuff is your domain; it was stupid to try to go it alone. I’m sorryIdidn’t believe inyou.”
“I think I can forgive you, considering the demonic manipulation in the mix and all.” She gave me a bittersweet little smile. “You did fend them off all on your own when it mattered the most.”
A hint of this afternoon’s anger flickered in my chest. “I’d happily see your dad blasted to bits—don’t get me wrong. I just wasn’t going to let the demons do it for whatever reasons they have.”
“You said you think they were trying to create a blood sacrifice for more power,” Rose said.
I’d told her that much on the way back. “Yeah. I have this sense…” It trickled through me now when I opened myself to it: the flavor of rot, the impression of decay. “Somewhere on the estate, off where no one’s likely to stumble on it, they’ve been working magic for a purpose of their own whenever I let some loose. If I let myself try, I think I can find the spot.”
“We’d better deal with that now. Whatever power they’re working on you, it’ll be tied up in any other magic they have in this world. We’ll need to tackle it all at once.”
She released my hand to get out of the car, but as soon as she’d rejoined me on the drive, she grasped it again, twining her fingers with mine. The other guys came over, their expressions concerned but not angry or horrified the way I might have deserved after the danger I’d put us all in.
“Damon and I are going demon-hunting,” Rose said with a wry quirk of her lips. “This is going to be a magical confrontation. The rest of you will be safer if you stay back here.”
Kyler was shaking his head before she’d even finished speaking. “Forget that. We fought them off together before, and we’ll do it again.”
Seth tipped his head toward the house. “We could dip into that set of supplies Ky suggested we get from the Assembly, couldn’t we?”