I yanked my eyes away, only to have my gaze jar on Dad, yet again, sitting on the black-and-green striped sofa bent over an engine schematic he’d laid out on the birch coffee table. My mind was reeling now. I took a step toward him, my voice coming out in a croak. “Dad?”
My voice broke the illusion. That version of him snuffed out, and all at once the room around me blurred. Blurred into the dingy wallpaper and shabby furnishings of the living room in the apartment we’d moved to in town, after Mr. Hallowell’s abrupt firing. To my dad sprawled at the edge of the rug, the pool of blood around his head soaking into the thin yellow fabric—
My breath shot from my lungs as if I’d been kicked in the chest, the same way it had when I’d been faced with this scene in reality over ten years ago. I closed my eyes, clamping my mouth shut before more of the metallic bloody odor could lace my tongue, and willed the whole mess away.
None of it was real now. I didn’t want to see Dad—not like that, not like when we’d lived here, not at all. I’d accepted a long time ago that I was moving on without him.
When I looked again, the room had reverted back to the same old apartment. I prowled through the space, tentatively and then more briskly, checking the kitchen and the two bedrooms, braced for another apparition.
No more sign of Dad. Apparently he was finished haunting me for the moment.
I stopped in the master bedroom to completely recover my breath, and my attention settled on the boxes stacked by the far wall. They held remnants of our time here that we either hadn’t had room or time to bring with us when we’d been kicked out so suddenly. No one had lived in this apartment between our stay and my moving back in, so all our things had remained for my return. My stomach had clenched up at the thought of tossing any of it, but I hadn’t wanted to see Dad’s former possessions on display every time I turned around either, as right as it’d felt taking over the apartment itself.
Maybe holding onto them had been a mistake—like Seth avoiding his own dad, like Jin putting off showing his art farther afield. What good were those old things doing me in boxes? They might as well have been ghosts too, tying Dad to this space even as I tried to make a new life for myself here.
I opened the boxes one by one to take in their contents. Two were full of clothes: the more formal button-up shirts, slacks, and single suit Dad hadn’t bothered bringing with him, sticking to his more usual tees, sweaters, and jeans instead. He’d been narrower in the shoulders and chest than me, and none of these fit me properly.
Another three boxes held the substantial portion of his book collection that he’d abandoned here. Then the remains of our combined CD collection. Finally, some random odds and ends: a bronze figurine of a rearing horse, a tarnished trophy I’d won for some event I couldn’t remember back in elementary school, a few of his mugs. Behind the boxes, a couple of paintings Dad had bought that I’d taken down from the living room leaned against the wall.
Other than the trophy and possibly the CDs, none of this stuff was junk.Ididn’t want it, but someone else could put it to use. A hell of a lot more use than any of it was getting right now.
I took some time to dig through the boxes more thoroughly, deciding on a few items I did want to keep. This tie of Dad’s didn’t have strong associations, and there wouldn’t be any issues with fit. A few of these books I might actually want to read at some point. Then I carted the rest down to the ground floor. I couldn’t transport them using the motorcycle, but Rose was due home soon, and she’d always been happy to lend me the Buick when I needed it.
As I stacked the boxes by the garage door in preparation, Damon came sauntering across the front yard. A bit of his usual glowering attitude still showed in his expression, but his stance looked more relaxed than it’d been lately, no outright storm clouds gathering over his head.
That was a relief. I wasn’t going to deny the guy the right to be pissed off about whatever rubbed him the wrong way, even if there were a lot of those things, but I couldn’t imagine it was all that enjoyable forhim, let alone the rest of us, when the chip on his shoulder was rankling him. It’d appeared to be rankling him a lot in the past couple of weeks. I’d have tried to get him to open up about why if I hadn’t suspected that would only make him more pissed off with me specifically.
He glanced from me to the boxes with a puzzled expression. “What’s all that? Moving somewhere?”
I laughed at the thought of going anywhere now that I was settled in so comfortably on the estate. I’d left Rose once since I’d returned to town—and not because I’d wanted to, only because I’d thought I needed to so I could buy her an advantage that would overcome our enemies. I’d only been away for a matter of days, and they’d been agony.
“Not likely,” I said. “You all are stuck with me now. I just figured it’s time to clear out most of my dad’s old things. I don’t know why I was hanging on to them anyway. I’ll bring them to the charity shop in town, and then someone who’ll actually get something out of them can use them.”
Something shifted behind Damon’s eyes. His mouth tightened, but I didn’t get the impression he was annoyed by my explanation. If anything, he looked a little regretful, which didn’t make much sense. He and my dad had barely interacted, as far as I could recall.
“It must be hard, getting rid of so much stuff all of a sudden,” he ventured. His gaze fixed on me with an intentness I didn’t understand either. Was he thinking about his own dad, who’d run out on him and his mom when he’d been a little kid? I didn’t know if he still had anything that’d belonged to the guy.
“You know, I expected it to be, but I actually feel kind of elated, taking this step.” I motioned to the boxes. “Instead of hiding what’s left of Dad’s life away, I’m getting it out into the world where it can do people some good. That feels… about as right as anything can.”
“I guess that makes sense.” Damon offered me an awkward smile. He opened his mouth as if he was going to add something, but just then the gate whirred open again to admit Rose’s Buick.
As soon as she turned the car toward the garage, I spotted the damage. I walked to meet her at the driver’s side door.
“Hey,” I said, setting that concern aside for a moment to beam at her. She bobbed up to give me a quick kiss, her grin in return setting off a rush of warmth right through my body. I forced myself to refocus on what was technically my job, with a tip of my head toward the rear of the car. “What happened there?”
Rose grimaced as we studied the area just past the back door. A dent about the size of my hand marked the pale blue surface. Scratch marks ran through it and streaked several inches farther, revealing the darker metal under the paint.
“Someone must have bumped the car while it was parked on the street,” Rose said. “I didn’t see it happen, and they didn’t leave a note. Nothing some magic can’t fix.” She wiggled her fingers, but her smile looked a little tired.
“Hey,” I said. “That should be my job. I’ve got to earn my keep around here, don’t I?” I enjoyed puttering around with all the estate’s vehicles, but getting down to work for Rose’s direct benefit was the most satisfying feeling of all.
She shot me an amused glance. “If you want to do the repairs, you can. Will it be very hard to fix the nonmagical way?”
I shook my head. “I’ll just need to get my hands on some paint to match. Might be a little tricky, given the age of the car…” I gave her a peck on the forehead. “You might want to start thinking about whether there’s another color you’d like in case I have to repaint the whole thing. Or I suppose I might let you take over with your skills in that case.”
She chuckled. “Maybe it’s time for a refresh anyway. I’ll come up with a few ideas, but I trust your connections.” Her gaze slid past me to the boxes. “What have you been up to?”
With my consort next to me in all her sweetness and good humor, I felt even more sure of my decision. “Just some old things of my dad’s I was hoping to bring into town…”