I let go of the now bloodied rose and watch it fall to the ground. I step on it with my boots, smashing it beneath the chunky soles. Something so beautiful, ruined so easily. Just like my innocence was.
Sometimes I lament the fact that I never got my childhood back after my parents' confession. But I tell myself it had to happen this way. Since I was a little girl, I knew I was special to Xavier, which means I am the only one who can take him down. Because he has no idea what I'm capable of.
Playing the role of the naive, bratty submissive was a game I knew I was going to win. For reasons unknown to me, Xavier Gunn has always been infatuated by me. And that will ultimately be his downfall.
"Do you know when Xavier is coming?" I ask the guard, painting a smile of innocence on my strained face. "It's my birthday."
He shrugs. I don't get much else out of the guy. I miss Antonio. He was so easy to manipulate... until he got close to the truth.
After he admitted his feelings to me, Antonio got too close to the truth. I knew he was on the right trail. I knew he'd find out about my training and my family's ultimate goal - to end Xavier's life, and to have me deliver the final blow.
That's why Antonio had to die.
He may have been innocent, but he was still a pawn. And my family and I couldn't risk anybody standing in our way. There's a bigger purpose to all of this, not just revenge. Once Xavier is gone, my father will regain his place and lead two cartels at once.
Xavier must die. That's all that matters and all I've been trained for, for years.
After my parents explained I would kill Xavier, I underwent assassin training. I know how to fight, how to shoot, and most importantly, how to charm my way into Xavier's heart so I can stop it from beating ever again.
And I know tonight is my last chance. I need to see him soon. I need to kill him soon.
I wander the gardens, slyly keeping my eyes pealed for a sign of my guardian, but he's nowhere to be seen. Traitorous disappointment sends my head spinning.
Throughout my training, there was one thing I struggled with. My attachment, my feelings for the cruel man who took me away from my parents.
After Mom and Dad told me what he did, I wanted to hate Xavier. But my childlike infatuation with him never quite went away. I still get goosebumps, butterflies, shivers when he touches me. I tried so hard to fight it. I've laid awake at night, repeating to myself that Xavier is a fucking monster. And yet those feelings never went away.
My only hope is that they will after he's dead. Because Xavier's death is inescapable, and I'm the only one he trusts enough to let me get close.
Now that I'm eighteen, I know Xavier will make his move. He'll waste no time fucking me, making me his wife, and knocking me up to ensure his sick empire has an heir.
But not if I can help it.
I head back into the house. None of the servants look or acknowledge me. I'm a ghost in this house. Everyone here is too afraid of Xavier to so much as say one word to me.
I wonder what my life will be like after I kill him.
Will I pick a new role to play, or will I finally be free?
Doubt clutches my heart in its icy fingers and I shake my head to free myself from those troubling thoughts. I'm desperate for Hades' and Zeus' company. Those dogs always calm me down. But they must be with Xavier. I try to pretend their betrayal doesn't hurt me, but deep down, it feels like Xavier won once again. As much as I hate him, he's ruled over my life, and will continue to do so until I deal the fatal blow that will kill him.
It has to happen tonight.
I've waited long enough, stretching my time spent with him as long as I could. The last time I saw my parents, they didn't understand why I haven't acted on it yet. But I wasn't ready. And I don't know if I'm ready now, but I don't have a choice.
I need a weapon, and I need my cross necklace back most of all. I want to go in Xavier's study to find it, but the relentless guard hot on my trail is preventing me from going snooping. I need to get rid of him. The house is relatively empty today. I could send him on a fool's errand... Just have to think of something for him to do.
Embracing the bratty side of me which Xavier loves to hate, I purse my lips, folding my arms across my chest as I face the new guard.